Chuck Bartowski quotes from Chuck

Sarah

[about the antidote] Here!

Chuck

No, no it's for Ellie.

Sarah

No, I'm sorry, Chuck, there's no debate. It has to be you. You're the Intersect.

Chuck

I won't take it knowing that Ellie will die without it; that both of you have been poisoned too!

Casey

You're a good person, Chuck, and I respect that, but I have a job to do, so take it before I shove it down your throat!

Chuck

Okay, okay. Fine, fine I'll do it.

Sarah

Thank you.

Sarah

It's the poison. It makes you tell the truth!

Casey

You do that, I'll give chase, put a gun to your head, threaten to pull the trigger if you don't take it!

Chuck

Would you really shoot me?

Casey

No.

Chuck

Yeah, don't waste a bullet, we're already dead!

Sarah

I am so sorry about all of this.

Chuck

That's okay, it's okay. It's not ideal but I've lived a pretty good life. I mean, how many guys can say they landed a helicopter and saved the lives of innocent people?

Casey

Courageous and honorable members of the United States military.

Chuck

[to Sarah, under the influence of a truth serum] God you're so pretty! And Casey, your jaw was chiseled by Michelangelo himself.

Casey

Thank you.

Chuck

I am in the bathroom! Is there nothing sacred to you people?

Casey

Just the right to bear arms.

Chuck

Okay. Okay, Intersect: flash! Show me how to do this.

Sarah

Did you flash?

Chuck

No, nothing. C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon baby, don't fail me now, c'mon.

Sarah

Okay Chuck, that's enough. Run; I'm gonna try and stay and defuse it.

Chuck

No, I'm not leaving you here.

Sarah

Go, that is an order.

Chuck

[Indignant] No.

Sarah

I said go!

Chuck

Oh, I see, so you're gonna shoot me to prevent me from being blown up; that's a great plan.

Sarah

Why are you so stubborn?

Chuck

Actually, I consider this a rare moment of courage. I don't know where it's coming from; I guess you just bring out the worst in me.

Sarah

And you in me.

Chuck

It was nice knowing ya.

Sarah

[out of breath] Well, the good news is we're alive and the bad news is that this is kind of an uncomfortable moment right now.

Chuck

This is completely comfortable on my end...just saying.

Sarah

Look Chuck, I been thinking about our breakup and I’m not sure it’s the best idea.

Chuck

Miss me already, huh?

Sarah

Well, you know, for the cover. It makes things easier.

Chuck

Well I guess your job just got a little bit harder.

Sarah

Look, I’m sorry you thought there was something between us. It’s very common in these situations to perceive a connection that isn’t there.

Chuck

Of course I get it. It’s the old story, you know, guy gets supercomputer in his brain, beautiful CIA agent is sent to protect him and then she tells him while under the spell of a truth serum she’s not interested. I get it. But for me the emotional roller coaster is a little much so I think I would rather find something a little less common, like say I don’t know, a real relationship.

Sarah

Okay, Chuck if that's what you want then I’m going to have to sell it. [Sarah starts crying]

Chuck

You okay? [Sarah leaves and is spotted by Jeff and Lester]

Jeff

Heart breaker.

Lester

Dream maker.

Jeff

Love taker.

Lester

Don't you mess around with Chuck.

Casey

[Bryce is using Chuck at a shield] I've got a shot.

Chuck

No, you don't!

Casey

You'll be fine.

Chuck

No shooting, no shooting! I'm susceptible to bullets!

Bryce

Hello, Chuck.

Chuck

Sarah and Casey are right inside; one girlish scream from me and they go into combat mode!

Awesome

So, Thanksgiving. We're all supposed to say what we're thankful for. I'm thankful for the most beautiful woman in the world, Ellie Bartowski.

Morgan

Good call.

Anna

Morgan.

Morgan

Aww, right.

Ellie

That's sweet, honey. I am thankful for my family and my friends.

Casey

I pass.

Awesome

Chuck.

Chuck

I'm thankful that Bryce Larkin is dead. And is not currently in my bedroom making out with my new girlfriend.

Casey

[gets the hint and leaves the table] Excuse me, please.

Morgan

Wow, buddy, that was, um, really dark.

Awesome

And specific.

Sarah

[to Bryce] Why Chuck?

Chuck

Yeah! Why Chuck?

Casey

Decided to take up bird watching?

Chuck

Just breathing in the view.

Casey

Hmm.

Chuck

I know that grunt. Yeah, that's the number 7, right? Skeptical with a side of cynicism.

Casey

Just clearing my throat. Just couldn't help but notice Agent Walker's car isn't in her usual spot.

Chuck

Oh, I didn't, uh...It's weird. I didn't notice, I didn't see that at all. Fine maybe I did. So? Have you talked to Sarah lately?

Casey

Agent Walker and I don't do a lot of fraternizing off hours. Guess we'll just have to see.

Chuck

See...See What? Why? See what?

Casey

See if she's had enough of the good life with you. See if she's hightailed it to wherever your buddy Bryce is hiding himself.

Chuck

Is that, uh, is that an option?

Casey

Oh, Don't worry. I hear there's a great selection of new handlers in this year's CIA Christmas catalog.

Chuck

Are there? Thanks a lot.

Morgan

A relationship is built on trust, Chuck. Sex and trust. Am I right?

Chuck

Yeah, yeah, two big prerequisites I guess.

Casey

Chuck! Sarah!

Sarah

Casey, What are you doing here?

Casey

Someone needs to protect the Intersect.

Chuck

Very thoughtful. Thank you very much, I guess.

Casey

Plus, I didn't want to miss any gun play. Come on.

Casey

Why's it so important to you Chuck? Why the hell do you care so much about me and Ilsa?

Chuck

I don't...I don't know man, OK, I juse-I think it'd be nice to know that you had a life before...this. I just figure that if a guy like you can find love, no offense, Casey, then maybe there's hope for me too, maybe this spy business isn't as screwed up as I think it is.

Casey

Hmmm.

Chuck

Hmmm? That's, that's okay, you know what? If you want to go through life all emotionally constipated and alone then suit yourself. I'll let you go back to protecting the greater good you freaking robot!

Casey

I met her in a flower market. In Rome. Ilsa was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.

Chuck

I knew it. IT'S ALIVE!

Casey

Relax, I think I see a scenario where we both get out of here with acceptable losses.

Chuck

What exactly is your version of acceptable?

Casey

Breaks and punctures, possible loss of a limb, no major organ damage.