Phoebe Halliwell quotes from Charmed

She's a f...

(interrupting) Fellow whitelighter. See, I finished your sentence.

Hm. That's not what I was going to say.

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You must prepare yourselves for battle. Mentally, physically, spiritually, sartorially...

(Piper scoffs)

Phoebe

I'm sorry, what?

She doesn't like our clothes.

You need clothes that are loose and move. That means no more braless, strapless... fearless attire.

Okay, then I have nothing to wear.

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Alright, lets pretend I'm the enemy.

Oh, that is way too easy.

(Phoebe claps her hands and Piper giggles)

Very funny. Now, talk me through how you plan to separate me from my crossbow.

OK, first I freeze you.

I deflect that.

Phoebe

I guess I could levitate and kick you.

You just kicked a clone.

All right, how about I send in an astral Prue as a decoy and then I just ... (flicks her hand and yanks the piece of wood out of Natalie's hand) Oh, I'm so sorry. (Phoebe laughs at Prue's sarcasm)

Not as sorry as you would be if I just blinked behind you and stabbed you to death.

Well, that would be bad.

Ouch.

Phoebe

All right, you know what? This is too hard. Usually in these situations, you know, everything happens so quickly. The adrenaline is pumping.

I want you to think using your brains, not your glands. Now try again.

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Phoebe

Hey, if we don't vanquish Eames, can we at least vanquish Natalie?

Don't tempt me.

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Something doesn't feel right. This was way too easy.

Phoebe

Or even worse, anticlimactic.

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(Eames writhes in agony as the arrow's poison takes effect, while the sisters stand over him glowering)

EEames

What the hell are you doing up here?

Phoebe

Kicking your ass!

Don't even bother trying to orb out. It won't work. You see, you didn't just get the powers of a Whitelighter, but you get their vulnerability too. So the poison in that arrow is killing you just like you killed Natalie.

It's kind of poetic.

Phoebe

I'm kind of in a rhyming mood--how about you, girls?

Sure, this poison isn't working fast enough for me.

PPPrue, Piper and Phoebe

Time for amends and a victim's revenge ...

Cloning power, turn sour ... (Eames bursts into flames and screams in agony)

Power to change, turn to strange ...

Phoebe

(in a mock Texas accent) I'm rejectin' your deflection! (Eames disintegrates)

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Phoebe

Piper also babbles when she's nervous.

I resent that. I am expressing a valid concern about this continuing issue in our lives.

[walking in] What are you babbling about?

[Phoebe laughs]

You know, if I could freeze the two of you, I would. Often.

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I sorta... kinda lost the wedding ring.

(Piper gasps and Prue looks shocked.)

Darryl

I've got a great ring guy downtown if you need one.

He doesn't need one, he has a ring. Mom's ring. I gave it to him, so he could give it back to me at the perfect, romantic moment!

Phoebe

Wow, Leo, you lost Mom's ring. It's a good thing you're dead already.

I had it in my pocket, Piper. All the orbing in and out...

Your orbs are grass if you do not find that ring.

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You have to tell them, Phoebe. You can't wait any longer.

Phoebe

Well, it's not really an easy thing to drop into conversation, Leo. You know, like "your hair looks great. Cole's not dead. I let him go."

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Phoebe

I cast a little spell.

Darryl

The less I know, the happier I am.

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PPPiper and Phoebe

Guiding spirits I ask your charity,

Lend me your focus and clarity,

Lead me to the one i cannot find,

Restore that and my piece of mind.

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[Piper and Phoebe blink from the kitchen into the living room]

Catch us if you can!

Phoebe

Have you tried it yet, Leo? It's a real head rush.

Do you realize how serious this is? You're blinking, the Book is changing.

Maybe we're blinking because of the Book.

The Book is changing because of you. It is an extension of you.

I should care about that--but I don't.

This is what I was afraid of. Whoever's got Prue is somehow reaching you too.

Phoebe

Okay Leo, I can tell this really upsets you, but I gotta tell you, I really like this whole 'think it and it happens' deal. I mean, just think of the time we could save not chanting!

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[after Piper freezes the female wedding planner]

Have you guys lost your minds?

Phoebe

Oh, Leo, get on board. Whatever it is, this is fabulous. You can't imagine the freedom, the power.

Phoebe, that is evil talking. You have to fight it!

Phoebe

What did you ever see in him?

I don't know. He is kind of a stick in the mud, isn't he?

Phoebe

Oh, another great idea! May I?

Be my guest.

All right, think about the power of... [he gets cut off when Phoebe waves her hand and turns him into a stick in a barrel of mud.]

Phoebe

Look at all the fun we've been missing.

And this is just the beginning!

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[after Leo orbs out.]

[sarcastically] Oh no--he's gone. We're free!

Phoebe

Yes.

No more obeying the rules, considering the consequences, none of that crap!

Phoebe

Time to find Prue and go for broke.

Where are you going?

Phoebe

Well, I can't wreak havoc dressed like this.

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[Cole shimmers into Phoebe's bedroom] Phoebe, if what I found out is true, Prue is in serious trouble. She's being forced to marry a warlock.

Phoebe

Figures that bitch would steal Piper's thunder!

You don't understand. A high-level priestess named Dantalian is rumored to have married them. She's got the power to turn Prue evil and turn you evil too. That's what's happening here.

Phoebe

So? Isn't that the way you want me? [she kisses him passionately again]

No, that is not how I want you to be. It is not how I want us to be. Our only chance is if we're both... good.

Phoebe

Love is love.

There is no such thing as evil love. It's only gratification, lust.