Temperance Brennan quotes from Bones

Brennan

You're the least objective person I have ever met.

Booth

Thank you.

Brennan

It's not a compliment.

Brennan

[after catching the head that fell from the tree] I am going to need an evidence bag!

Booth

Heads up!

Brennan

I am going to need a bigger bag.

Goodman

It's time to live a little, Temperance. Connect with other people.

Brennan

Are you suggesting that I take this opportunity to have sex with Booth on a field trip?

Goodman

Good God! Where's Dr. Freud when you need him?

Brennan

Residual cross-section striae.

Booth

Hmm... Just because you say it in that definitive tone doesn't mean it means anything to me.

Booth

You're a smart ass, you know that?

Brennan

Objectively I'd say I'm very smart, although it has nothing to do with my ass.

Did you ever hear of the bone gatherers, collecting bones so that the dead can make their journey to the next world?

Brennan

Not even sure I believe in the next world.

Doesn't matter what you believe in. You're a bone gatherer. That's a good thing, helping the spirits move on.

Brennan

Thank you. It's probably the best job description I will ever get.

You mind if I make an observation?

Brennan

No, of course not.

In your book, the cops come off as very one-dimensional. Why is that?

Brennan

You mean two-dimensional.

Zack

One-dimensionality exists only in theory as a mathematical value.

O-kay. Really looking forward to your next book.

Goodman

When I said you should think of this invitation as a summons, I understated it. It's a subpoena, a Grand Jury subpoena. Ignore it at your own peril.

Brennan

You're not going to fire us if we don't go.

Goodman

No, not fire you, but I can move your parking spots to Lot M. Enjoy the shuttle ride.

Zack

The shuttle smells like feet.

Zack

These are the smallest remains I've ever worked on.

Brennan

That's a valid observation, Zack, but it's not helpful to the investigation.

Zack

Sorry, Dr. Brennan.

Brennan

I was at Waco. Branch Davidian compound. I helped identify children who had been killed in the fire, seventeen of them.

Zack

So you're saying I'll get used to it?

Brennan

No, I'm saying you will never get used to it. We're primates, social creatures. It's coded into our DNA to protect our young, even from each other.

Zack

So I'm always going to feel terrible?

Brennan

What helps me is to pull back emotionally. Just... put your heart in a box.

Zack

I'm not good with metaphor, Dr. Brennan.

Brennan

Focus on the details.

Zack

Details, yeah. I can do that.

Brennan

I'm afraid Angela might quit.

Booth

I'm amazed she stuck it out this long.

Brennan

Why?

Booth

Well, because she's human. I'm sorry, Bones, it's just that, you know, Angela didn't get the same training the rest of you got on Planet Vulcan.

Brennan

Do you remember me, Sean?

You're the museum lady, the one who's so smart.

Brennan

Yeah, I'm pretty smart.

[sarcastically] And modest.

Booth

Oh, believe me, she is being modest.

Zack

What do we talk about?

Goodman

Your work, of course.

Angela

Zack's work consists of removing flesh from corpses. Hodgins dissects bugs that have been eating people's eyeballs.

Hodgins

Leave me out of it, I am not going.

Dr. Goodman

And how do you see your job?

Angela

I draw death masks.

Goodman

Is that really how you see it?

Angela

Don't you?

Goodman

You are the best of us, Miss Montenegro! You discern humanity in the wreck of a ruined human body! You give victims back their faces! Their identities! You remind us all of why we're here in the first place! Because we treasure human life!

Goodman

Oh for God's sake.

Brennan

What happened?

Zack

Apparently, all Angela needed was to hear her job description in a deep, African-American tone.

Angela

TGIF? You've heard of that?

Brennan

Yeah, it's some kind of acronym, but my inbox is full.

Angela

We know that's not true.

Brennan

A student needs help identifying some remains, and there's a TV show that needs research. Not that they listen.

Angela

We're going.

Brennan

I really should catalog that skull. It's in the museum's exhibit on the French Revolution.

Angela

Yeah, Pepe le Pew is more important than booze and boys.

Brennan

I don't think that's his name.

Angela

We are so gonna tear it up tonight!

Brennan

That's slang, right?

Angela

Right.

Brennan

Do you ever go on vacation?

Zack

I take my vacation when you take your vacation.

Brennan

What do you do?

Zack

Go back home to Michigan, see the family. I have three brothers and four sisters.

Brennan

Do you enjoy that?

Zack

God, no. I made the mistake of telling them I work with corpses and skeletons. They think I'm a freak.

Brennan

Then why do you go?

Zack

They're my family... They love me.