J1Jennifer #1
Oh, what the heck.
JJennifers
It's Christmas! (they all kiss Carlos and leave)
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
Tomorrow is Christmas, with toys and snow AND TOYS.
Christmas is not about toys! It's about giving, and being with the people you love.
KCKendall, Carlos, Logan and Katie
No, it's about toys.
(walks in having been attacked by many girls) Mistletoe... BAD!! (falls to the ground)
Now, since it's Christmas Eve, I'm off to the office to fire some people.
Actually, you wrote Yard Squirrel Christmas in five minutes and it's still your biggest selling single. (screen close-ups to show a platinum record) Ever.
(Flashback)
YSYard Squirrel
It's a yard squirrel Christmas, and all we need is this!
YARRRRRRRRRRRD SQUIRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRELS!!!!!!!!
(End flashback)
It was just a STUPID novelty song, with SPED-UP voices, and I HATED it!
Hey! I loved that song.
EVERYBODY loved that song.
I write the best pop songs IN THE WORLD and I will NOT be remembered for some STUPID SQUIRREL SONG!
...Get me blank music sheets, 13 candy canes, and a cup of cocoa with marshmallows piled high. Because we're about to pull off a big time Christmas miracle! (the others cheer)
Okay, I just pushed our flights back four hours.
(all talking on phones)
And how are we doing on our celebrity search?
(hangs up) I just got off the phone with Lady Gaga's people.
Ooh! What did she say?
"Who's Big Time Rush?"
What about Jordin Sparks?
Out of town for the holidays. Just like every other celebrity we could sing with.
(grunts angrily)
On the bright side, astronaut Buzz Aldrin is very interested. (Everyone looks at him.) Second man to walk on the moon!
There's got to be some celebrity that's still in town! (slams his fist on the remote and TV changes channels)
(on the TV) So join me, Miranda Cosgrove, from my Have Yourself a Miranda Little Christmas Special live from Los Angeles. (Everyone starts looking at the TV) With duets with your all of your favorite stars like international superstar Fabio, Lightning the T.V. Wonder Dog and-
(pauses the t.v. and the boys go to the TV)
Big Time Rush!
How?
It'll be another Christmas miracle.
I think he's choking.
SGSecurity Guard
(falls to the ground)
It's another Christmas miracle!
(Everyone starts running into the studio but stop and turn to the security guard and feel guilty.)
Okay, we might be horrible people.
(Everyone goes back to the security guard.)
Get him up! Get him up!
(James, Carlos and Logan help the security guard up and Kelly does to Heimlich Maneuver. The security guard spits out the food on Gustavo.)
(disgusted) Oh! That was gross!
SGSecurity Guard
Thanks. Who are you guys?
We're Big Time Rush and we just want to get home for the holidays.
(Everyone begs the security officer to let them through.)
SGSecurity Guard
Well, merry Christmas. (drops his clipboard and bends down)
EEveryone
(confused)
SGSecurity Guard
I dropped my clipboard and distracted and can't see you!
EEveryone
(gets it and thanks the security guard and runs inside the studio)
(after the boys are caught by Miranda and her manager)
MManager
You're all going to jail for Christmas!
Oh no! Don't call the police! We're allergic to police.
We weren't Fabio-napping, we were just hiding him so we could sing with Miranda...sorry, Fabio.
Look, if we don't record three Christmas songs by today, our grinchy CEO won't let us go home for Christmas!
We're Big Time Rush! We're a band!
(turns to her manager) ...They're really cute.
MManager
They locked Fabio in a costume bin!
Yeah, but...they're really cute.
MManager
My daughter does love their album.
FFabio
And they did give me some tasty snacks and a movie to watch for me. And by the way, I'm a horrible singer.
He's right. He's a horrible singer.
And we can sing.
(harmonizing) Sing...
(harmonizing) Sing...
(harmonizing) Sing!
So, how are we doing?
Honestly? It could go either way.
(scene cuts to Kelly and Gustavo hiding in front of the studio sound board.)
Okay, the producers should be freaking out looking for a replacement for Fabio.
Which means either a Christmas miracle happened and the dogs are in wardrobe, or they got caught AND WE'RE GOING TO JAIL FOR CHRISTMAS!!!
(come in and greet Miranda)
Press record! Press record!
Fiji here I come! (presses record)
Do you guys want to sing a song with me?
Yeah sure.
(turns around) AHHHHHH! (gets hit by a limo)
BKThe Boys and Kelly
(shocked and sees the limo stop and the window opens)
Please don't tell me I just ran over a reindeer.
BKThe Boys and Kelly
SNOOP DOGG?!
It's a Christmas miracle!
(Snoop and the boys records their version of "The Twelve Days of Christmas")
On the twelfth day of Christmas, Snoop gave to me:
12 ringside tickets...
11 books on physics...
10 juicy corndogs...
9 lucky combs...
8 wooly beanies...
7 sweater vests...
6 hockey helmets...
5 municipal bonds with a compound interest rate 3% acruity monthly.
(The song stops as the boys look at Snoop confused.)
What? You gotta make your money worth you.
(The boys understand and the song resumes.)
4 comfy PJs...
3 canned hams, 2 fractured femurs...
(Gustavo, Kelly, Griffin are listening to the song.)
And a song for the Christmas EP.
BTBig Time Rush and Snoop Dogg
And a song for the Christmas EP.
And that makes 3 BTR Christmas songs. Fiji, here we come!
Except...Justin Bieber just released 50 Days of Christmas with 50 Cent. It's over eight hours long, and it's a masterpiece!
WHAT?!
WHAT?!
WHAT?!
WHAT?! Yeah, I gotta be there in fifteen minutes.
(in a squirrel voice) Come on Gustavo! It's Christmas!
(in a squirrel voice You can wear your PJs!
(in a squirrel voice) Do it for Fiji wiji!
(in a squirrel voice) You can do it Gustavo!
(turns off the squirrel voice) And I need to get to my grandma's house.
(The third song is finished)
Well...Grandma may not like it, but I...love it! (the others cheer. Kelly hands him a disk which he then hands to his executive) Upload this immediately so kids can enjoy a big time Christmas all around the world. And I...will enjoy big time profits.
I had fun, boys, but I GOT to get to my Grandmama's!
And we gotta get to Minnesota!
Well you can all make your flights if you leave RIGHT NOW.
(holds up suitcases) HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!
RUN!
RUN!
RUN!
RUN!
RUN!
AAll
RUN!!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Big Time Rush pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.