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S1 E5

Archer · Season 1, Episode 5

“Honeypot” quotes from Archer

23 quotes · page 2 of 2

“Honeypot” · Season 1, Episode 5

In this episode: Malory Archer (13), Charles (9), Woodhouse (4), Mallory (3), Dr. Krieger (2), Pam Poovey (1), Cheryl Tunt (1), Ray Gillette (1)

I think that's hot, like somebody murdering me is so... intimate.

[Later, discussing her fetish]

You seriously don't think that's hot?

I seriously think you're scary.

No no no no, like, a big, sweaty fireman carries you out of a burning building, lays you on the sidewalk and you think, "yeah, okay, he's gonna give me mouth-to-mouth", but instead he just starts choking the shit out of you, and the last sensation that you feel before you die is he is squeezing your throat so hard that a big, wet, blob of drool drips off his teeth and just, flurp, falls right onto your popped-out eyeball.

[Awkward pause]

Jesus Christ!

We bought those for him and if you throw them off the roof I will fly to New York and fling acid in your face.

How do you say "The Hulk" in Spanish?

RRamone

"El Hulk".

Gay.

RRamone

What? We don't have a word for "Hulk".

Do you have a word for "gay"?

RRamone

Gay.

Gayer! Jesus, Spanish! Our jobs aren't enough; now you gotta take our words?

[Stifling laughter] Woodhouse: he's all tied up somewhere, sc-scared and alone. PROBABLY DEHYDRATED!

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