Fred quotes from Angel

You want to fight fire with fire. Make sure the government and the other savages learn about Jasmine's love.

Exact-- (plays along) that's exactly right. Why should we be the only shiny, happy people?

We don't need to use the evil tools of (with air quotes) the man when we have (with air quotes) the wo-man. We need to trust that Jasmine's love will reach the rest of the world just like it reached us

Oh, happy day.

Wesley

Connor, what does Jasmine eat?

Connor

What?

Wesley

The creature in the sewer. It called her the devourer. Devourer of what?

Connor

I don't know.

Wesley

Don't You? The followers she randomly chooses to come to her room. The ones she sent to meet her in the banquet hall.

Lorne

They're the banquet.

Gunn

Wait. People? She eats people?

Oh, no.

Gunn

To Serve Man. It's To Serve Man all over again.

And now she's going global.

Lilah

I have been authorized to make you kids an offer.

You can't possibly think there's anything we'd want from you.

Lilah

I don't think you'll want it, but you'll take it, because this is the offer of a lifetime. [pauses] Just not, you know, mine.

Wesley

I'm still stuck back at, "Why on earth are we here?"

What, because we're crusaders against evil and now the law firm that represents most of the evil in the world has given us its LA branch to run however we want, probably in an attempt to corrupt, divide, or destroy us, and we all said yes in, like, 3 minutes?

Wesley

Your run-on sentences have gotten a lot less pointless

Oh, that's so sweet. And a tad condescending.

Spike

What? What?

Harmony

What the hell are you doing here, Spike?

Wesley

Harmony, please.

Gunn

This is Spike? *The* Spike?

Wait a minute. Who's...

Lorne

[calmly, to Spike] Easy, slim. Easy. No one's gonna hurt you.

Gunn

Speak for yourself, Green Jeans.

OK, would somebody please tell me who...

Wesley

William the Bloody. He's a vampire. One of the worst recorded. Second only to...

Angel

Me. But you're dead.

Harmony

Well, yeah. Who here isn't? [looks around] Besides him and him and her and... [to Lorne] What are you, again?

Spike

[lunges at Angel in game-face, but goes right through him and winds up standing in Angel's desk] Bugger.

I'm also detecting brainwave activity.

Angel

On Spike? Hmm. That *is* weird.

Spike

And this, bloody hell, wasn't mine. I'm not you. I don't give a piss about atonement or destiny. Just because I've got me a soul doesn't mean I'm gonna let myself be led around by...

Excuse me?

Wesley

Did - Did you just say - Spike has a soul? You never said.

Angel

Didn't seem worth mentioning, you know.

Gunn

Seems to be a lot of that.

Spike

Or maybe Captain Forehead was feeling a little less special. Didn't like me crashing his exclusive club. Another vampire with a soul in the world.

Angel

You're not *in* the world, Casper.

Spike

Think I'm hot, do you?

Hmm. Lukeworm. Just above room temperature.

Spike

[re: Wesley] We got a history, him and me.

What?

Spike

It was a long time ago. He was a young Watcher, fresh out of the academy, when we crossed paths. It was a, what-you-call, battle of wills...and blood was spilled. Vendettas were sworn. It was a whole--

My God...you're so full of crap.

Spike

Yeah. OK.

Nina

How would you--you're not a monster, too, are you?

Nope. Standard-issue science nerd. I did spend five years in a demon dimension...till Angel saved me.

Nina

Guess he saves a lot of girls, huh?

Girls, guys...puppies. He's pretty much an equal-opportunity saver.

Spike

I had a wee spat with a werewolf myself once. Fought for over an hour. Brutal. Vicious. I almost lost my--

Angel killed him with a pen.

[about Nina's abduction] The scariest thing was how organized they were. Almost military.

Wesley

An underground monster-hunting military organization. It's happened before.

Angel

I just want you to be careful, Fred, because I know how charming Spike can be.

Eve

He is quite the dish, with those eyes...

And the hair and the cheeks and--what do you think I am, stupid? I know he's been playing me with the looks and the smiles. I'm not some idiot schoolgirl with a crush.

Angel

Then what is it?

It's about doing what's right. Remember?

Spike

No. I'm not gonna end up like Pavayne--cheating Hell any way he could, no matter who it hurt.

Just proves what I've been telling everybody.

Spike

That I'm a handsome devil who brightens the place up?

That you're worth saving.

[slurring, as a demon bumps into her.] Hey, you want a piece of me, buddy? That's right, keep walking. You walk alone! You walk alone!

Wesley

Careful, that thing's loaded.

So am I. I mean, wow. Wes. Wesley, [puts her arms around Wesley's neck] I am totally drunk-faced!

Wesley

Because you can't hold your.. What are you drinking?

Nothing.

Wesley

You can't hold that.

Oh, yeah? Lightweight? How much have you had?

Wesley

[holds up a beer bottle] Including this, I've had... about 1/3 of a half of this beer.

That's weird, right?

Wesley

Yes, I think so. I think that's weird.

There's Gunn. Let's go ask him if that's weird.

Wesley

Hey. Hey, Gunn. Is something weird going on? [Gunn turns toward Wesley without moving his hands, which are together just below his waist] Charles, you just peed on my shoes.

Gunn

[looks down, confused] I'll be damned. [zips his zipper] That's weird.