Harmony Kendall quotes from Angel

Harmony

[to Spike] Oh, my God! You and the Slayer actually - I mean, I know you had that twisted obsession with her, but - Ugh! That's just - Ugh!

Harmony

[to Fred] We're totally bonding. We're like gal pals. This is awesome. You can teach me about life, and I can teach you how to dress better.

Harmony

[to Fred] I just wish I were more like you. You know, except for the part about being all into science... and not having a lot up front.

Harmony

He's the Demon Rights Activist? He told me he was an Astronaut!

Harmony

I want to help. Fred's my friend. We went out for drinks all the... once.

Harmony

Part of me always knew life would end after high school.

Wesley

Well, I'm unaware of any red bird statuary in downtown Los Angeles, so unless you are I suggest.. [Harmony pops another bubble] *someone* put a *stake* through that woman's heart if she persists in popping her bloody chewing gum!

Cordelia

Harmony, do me a favor, lose the gum.

Harmony

Okay, okay! Sorry. I thought it would help with the cravings.

Harmony

I mean, you'd think I'd get a thank you for not biting any of you.

Wesley

*What* are you doing!?! This book is twelve centuries old!

Harmony

Okay. So it's not like I messed up a new one.

Angel

Here we go. That's it. Drink up.

Harmony

Eww! Yech! It tastes funky.

Angel

It's pig's blood.

Harmony

Ugh, well, that's gonna go straight to my hips. [Sighs] How do you stand this?

Angel

You get used to it.

Harmony

I mean how do you stand everything? Being what you are, how can you deprive yourself of the taste? The sensation of rich, warm, human blood flowing into your mouth, bathing your tongue, caressing your throat with its sweet, sticky...

Gunn

[entering] I'm back!

Angel

Me too.

Wesley

Spike!

Angel

Spike.

Harmony

Blondie Bear?

Spike

What? What?

Harmony

What the hell are you doing here, Spike?

Wesley

Harmony, please.

Gunn

This is Spike? *The* Spike?

Wait a minute. Who's...

Lorne

[calmly, to Spike] Easy, slim. Easy. No one's gonna hurt you.

Gunn

Speak for yourself, Green Jeans.

OK, would somebody please tell me who...

Wesley

William the Bloody. He's a vampire. One of the worst recorded. Second only to...

Angel

Me. But you're dead.

Harmony

Well, yeah. Who here isn't? [looks around] Besides him and him and her and... [to Lorne] What are you, again?

Spike

[lunges at Angel in game-face, but goes right through him and winds up standing in Angel's desk] Bugger.

Harmony

Just since you're all soulful now, I thought maybe, just maybe, you might've learned to open up a little. You know, talk? But I guess a leopard can't change his stripes.

Spike

Spots, you dink. Leopards have spots.

Harmony

Oh! Excuse me, Mr. Brainy. Thank you so much for sharing. Wow. What a breakthrough.

Spike

Running away again.

Spike

Nice new M.O. I can see why heros like you get rewarded with the shiny new glass and chrome. Why didn't I think of that?

Angel

[Still walking] I'm not responsible for what happened to you.

Harmony

Angel it's almost 3:00 you have a meeting...

Angel

[interrupting with a hand out and still walking] Not now, Harmony.

Spike

And here you've even managed to get my ex-tumble, the littlest vampire, fetching coffee for you. Nice perks for the sell-out.

Angel

[Stops walking but still not facing Spike] A little tip, Spike. Try not to talk about things you don't understand.

Spike

[walks in front of Angel] I'm not the prat here. I know you Angel. What do you think you're doing? Made some devil's bargain to take over this company. Thought you'd use it to fight the evil of the world from inside the belly of the beast. Trouble is you're too busy fighting to see you and yours are getting digested.

Angel

Not gonna happen. [Moves to walk away again]

Spike

What? You think you're in control here? Guess again, mate. You're no more in control than I am. Except I'm not going to bloody stand for it while you're just a blind...Groxlar Beast.

Angel

What?

Spike

Oh, brilliant.

Angel

[sighs] Okay. Somebody want to tell me how a Groxlar Beast got past security? I don't have time for this.

Spike

'Course not. Man's gotta stay focused on profit margins and power lunches.

Harmony

Angel...

Angel

Yeah, Spike. I got a business to run. That means responsibilities, appointments to keep.

Harmony

[Pointing at the fallen Groxlar] That was your 3:00

Angel

That...

Angel

I'm meeting with Groxlars? They eat babies!

Harmony

Just their heads. You were supposed to open negotations with this clan.

Angel

Negotations for what?

Gunn

[Walking in wearing a suit and briefcase in hand] Get them to stop eating baby heads.

Angel

Oh, so that's good. [looking down at the Groxlar] So this...this is bad.

Gunn

No, actually the Groxlar Clan respects someone who takes a strong opening position. Wolfram and Hart didn't just jack me up with the human laws, also demons laws from every demension. Probably should have briefed you about the Groxlar, but [looks at Spike] we got a little... sidetracked.

Wesley

A bit reckless. Well, if Spike's going to be sticking around, it'd be prudent of him to share his plans with the rest of us in future.

Angel

Yeah, well, sharing's not something Spike does very well.

Harmony

Preaching to the horse's mouth.

Spike

[yelling after Angel] Try staking your mother when she's coming on to you!

Harmony

Well, that explains a lot.

Harmony

I just--I don't get it. Why'd you kill Eli?

Angel

Didn't much like what he was doing in his off hours.

Harmony

Well, that's not right. What Eli did on his own time--

Gunn

Is dismember virgins.

Harmony

Oh. Well, a person's religious beliefs is no cause for--

Gunn

He did it for his own amusement.

Harmony

Oh. Well, okay. Still, couldn't you've given him a stern warning or something first?

Angel

Called a zero-tolerance policy, not a maybe-this-once policy.