[Steve is playing his video game]
Steve, I asked you to set the table 10 minutes ago. Dinner is ready.
Well, I'm on level 1 of the house, where I cook for you. Now set the table.
I didn't ask you to cook for me.
Mom, I'm busy. I'll do it in a minute. [Francine unplugs Steve's game console] NO! IT DIDN'T SAVE! IT DIDN'T SAVE!! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING??!!
I was thinking... go set the table!
[Francine gasps, then Klaus gasps, then Hayley gasps, then Roger, doing some gymnastic moves in the attic, stops in mid-air]
[in the dining room, Stan and the family are admonishing Steve for his behavior]
Steve, I'm very disappointed that you used that language with your mother. That being said, I'm more excited for dinner than I have been in years.
You did a very bad thing. You know who had to set the table tonight? Me.
What are you talking about? I set the table.
Well, I would have been next in line and I did not like it.
Didn't you do my laundry?
No. What you said is something you don't say to your mother. So you must not think of me as a mother at all. So from now on, you're on your own. Mommy-free. Sans mommy. You ain't got no mama.
What's that, Francine? I think you dropped a challenge. And I'm picking it up, 'cause I can do everything you do for me, laundry, cooking, telling myself I'm a big handsome boy.
[opening the fridge to look for food] Where the hell are the leftovers?
[turns on light] Looking for something?
[seeing Barry eating his mac and cheese omelettes on the dining table with Francine] Barry? You're eating the leftovers?
Maybe you can have his leftovers.
We both know that's not gonna happen.
No dinner meant no dinner.
I didn't come down here for food. I'm down here for the crisper drawer. [He gets the crisper drawer and puts it in front of his face] I'm building a fort and it needs a window.
[Suddenly, Steve's stomach begins to grumble]
I'M HUNGRY TO FINISH MY FORT!
[during dinner with the family as Francine is preparing the mac and cheese omelettes] Hey, where's mine?
You didn't ask me to cook for you, remember?
But it was the heap of the moment, and...
[cuts off Steve] Steve, you really hurt my feelings. Part one of your punishments is I'm ignoring you. Part two is no dinner.
I got you dinner. You couldn't leave a ladder for me?
My mom would see it. It's too dangerous.
No, what's dangerous is crawling past Hayley's room with a plate full of chipped beef.
Wait, her room's on the other side of the hou--
[cuts off Steve] Let's not get bogged down in the details about who was masturbating where. You just have to end this war with your mom.
I tried, but she wants to keep fighting, so now I'm in it to win it.
Look at yourself. You've already lost, bud. You stink, and you're starving. And you're not wearing underwear.
We're best friends. I know your body. If you're not gonna make up with your mom, you've got to learn how to take care of yourself.
[Francine is appalled to discover that she and Steve were nearly the victim of Morning Mimosa's cruel hosts]
You know what, Trisha "The Sizzle"? Fuck you! [Turns to Steve] Sometimes it's okay to say it, like now, or when you're driving.
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These quotes come from Wikiquote's American Dad! pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License .
