Xena quotes from Xena: Warrior Princess

A long time ago you told me the cycle of hate has to end and the only way to end it is through love. It's a hard lesson to learn. Callisto couldn't possibly know or understand that.

'Cause when you think of the dead...

...the dead can hear you.

Xena

Are you alright?

Ares

I've been hanged, swung over a fire and nearly shishkabobed on razor sharp spikes! How do you mortals get from day to day?

Gabrielle

Well-- what? Oh. I don't have a gift for you.

Xena

Gabrielle, you are a gift to me

Salmoneus

Xena! I was just talking about you! Sort of.

Xena

Beauty contest!! You sent urgent word for us to see some underdressed, overdeveloped bimbos in a beauty contest!

Gabrielle

Now why don't you just cancel the pageant?

Salmoneus

Lord Clairon's tried that. Each of these guys is so invested in winning, nobody wants to quit first. The way I see it – what we need is a contestant to keep an eye on things from the inside.

Gabrielle

Oh, no, no, no! Don't even look at me. Now you know how I feel about these women being victimized by meat markets.

Xena

She's right. But war makes everyone a victim. So... meet Miss Amphipolis.

Xena

Looking for this? Now I want some straight answers.

you've got the wrong girl. Okay, okay, I was just kidding where's you're sense of humor?

Xena

Gee, I must have sweated it out. That you idea of funny too?

I was just trying to scare you.

Xena

Why did you want to scare me?

because I knew you knew. You know about me. And I didn't want you telling anyone. But when I came back to unlock the door, you had already gone.

Xena

What made you think I would tell.

You really don't get it do you? I guess being born a woman, you wouldn't. This is a chance for me to use a part of me most people usually laugh at. Or worse. The part I usually have to hide. Only here, that part works for me, see?

Xena

I don't think so.

Look, I don't expect you to understand. And I'm sorry I got you steamed, I just hope you'll let me quit the pageant in private instead of going public with it.

Xena

No way. May the best person win.

Gabrielle

This is sabotage!

Xena

Gabrielle, it's just a bad dress.

Gabrielle

Bad dress? Xena, Chiffon is bad. Chartreuse is bad. But this is a disaster. You will be eliminated half way down the catwalk.

Xena

Calm down. Look, if it really bothers you, I'll fix it. [Cuts dress]

Xena

Trust me, you don't want to make me angry.

Oh, on the contrary. I'm looking forward to it.

Xena

Okay. Are we having fun yet? Oops. Don't hate me because I'm beautiful.

Gabrielle

So Miss Known World is a man?

Xena

Yep.

Gabrielle

That's kind of funny, huh?

Xena

Why? Beauty is beauty.

Gabrielle

And peace is peace.

Xena

Are you going to write about this?

Gabrielle

Oh, yes. I was thinking about calling it “Queen for a –

Xena

Gabrielle.

Gabrielle

“What a drag –

Xena

Gabrielle!

Gabrielle

Okay, okay.

Xena

Oh, that's right. You're fated to rule the world. Do you really believe that?

Of course. Each event in our life is part of a great plan. There are no accidents. Only destiny.

Xena

And who shapes this destiny - the gods?

Perhaps. Or it's the blood in our veins, our souls, our desires, our will. They're all in it, together, weaving a tapestry we call destiny.

Xena

Well, I can tell you one thing about your destiny: you're fated to have dinner in my cabin tonight.

Gabrielle

Does an Amazon Queen beat a Warrior Princess?

Xena

Do you really want to find out?

Callisto

[to Gabrielle] When I sliced open your husband, how long did it take him to die? [Callisto laughs and Gabrielle runs away]

Xena

There's a path out of the mountains to.... [watches Gabrielle run, then turns to Callisto] What's wrong with her?

Callisto

We played a game of truth or dare, but she's not very good at it.

Gabrielle

Xena, do you think that, deep down, Callisto feels sorry for the things that she's done?

Xena

No.

Gabrielle

I do. I have to or I can't forgive her. And if I can't forgive her, I can't move on. Goodbye, Callisto.

Gabrielle

Xena, this was our only frying pan. Why do you do that? You do have weapons, don't you?

Xena

I like to be creative in a fight. It gets my juices going.

Gabrielle

Can we cook with your juices?