Hey honey, what's cooking?
Not sure myself. Something that ends in -aroni.
S1Lord of the Bling
AAaron
Have you heard from your sister?
She sent a telegram. Heartbroken. Stop. Can't make it back from Sydney. Stop. Underwater shoot starts tomorrow. Stop. Entire crew said prayer for Mom. Stop. Love you. Stop.
AAaron
Logan...
Stop?
I'm ditching his party this weekend 'cause I don't want him getting all crazy violent every time a boy undresses me with his eyes, which happens all the time. It's not my fault. I can't help it--God made me fabulous.
You know what Mom would have wanted? She would have wanted you to not sleep with all her friends. She would have wanted you to care as much about her as your career. So okay, Dad, let's be honest. Maybe we both wished we'd been better. But she's only gone because of you.
S1Mars vs. Mars
There's a woman who saw my mom get out of her car and get in a van with a "mysterious stranger."
There's also a jungle tribe that worships Donald Trump's hair. It's a tabloid.
So the girl with a pig arm can't really bowl?
I just don't want you to get your hopes up.
I'm not paying you to worry about my hopes; I'm paying you to follow leads.
I wasn't aware you were paying me.
This isn't a favor. It's a job, you know. I mean, we're not exchanging friendship bracelets.
I'll stop braiding.
[Trying to filch info on her father's case, Veronica sets off a blue-dye packet in a trap he set for her.]
Hey, honey. What have you been up to?
Tell me where to put your Father of the Year trophy, 'cause there's some place I'd like to put it!
Wow. Good thing I didn't go with the bear trap.
This is not funny! I need to see that diary! She's lying. I know it. I can feel it with every fiber of my being.
Honey, you don't have to get all blue in the face.
You're patronizing me?
To be fair, I am your patron.
[Veronica is looking at a trophy case.]
If you're looking for my trophy, it's back by auto shop.
Lube job? Or, can you medal in stealing hub caps?
Is this 1970? Rims, baby.
So you got a trophy for a rim job?
Forget it. Look, I got some information for you.
Finally! A Deep Throat to call my own.
I'm not going to touch that one.
S1Ruskie Business
Caz is always flirty with me, but that guy would flirt with a trash can if it had boobs.
How hard can it be to find an actor named Tom Cruz?
Tom Cruise? Not as good a private eye as I thought.
Damn. This dog is a freak show. He oughta be in show biz.
D'you think that's some kind of rare breed or something?
That or a drunk dingo had a three-way with an ocelot and a porcupine.
Mexican hairless. What's the point of having a dog if it's bald? What are you gonna pet? Skin?
Don't forget. You're a high school girl. Do some high school girl things now and then.
Relax, Dad. I'm cutting pictures of Ashton out of Teen People as we speak.
[about Leo] Wow, Veronica, he totally wants to protect and serve you.
S1Betty and Veronica
Great game the other night man. Eighteen points, eight assists.
On the streets we call those dimes.
Streets? You live on the corner of Pleasant Valley and Marigold.
[as "Betty"] At my old school I was Horny! [receives odd looks] We were the Rhinos. I was the mascot.
RRichie
And what school was that?
Riverdale.
RRichie
Never heard of it.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Veronica Mars pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.