Berg? Berg, do you notice something different about our Sharon?
No, nothing. Except that somebody gift-wrapped her neck.
S1Two Guys, a Girl and a Guy
I gotta get to work.
Work? Or is Ted whisking you away to Scarf Warehouse?
Or House of Scarves.
Scarf Depot!
Jiffy Scarves!
BSBerg's Sneakers
Nothing can stop you! You're a winner!
8:40! Firm arch support and emotional support.
I never thought I'd say this, but-- Mr. Bauer makes sense. (Berg looks confused.) Not that we're pods!
We're gonna have to be--
No, no-no-no, don't say it!
--mature.
Oh, there, you said it.
I got stamps. Legends of the Rodeo: a thirty-two cent salute to a bygone era.
What's wrong with you?
Thanks a lot! I had a perfectly good boyfriend and you guys had to go turn him into a husband!
We were being mature!
Well, I'm not ready to be mature! I'm not done being friends with you guys yet.
S1Two Guys, a Girl and a Celtic Game
Well, today, we learned all about the letter B. We baked bread, we studied butterflies, the student of the day was Billy Bumstead.
Oh, well, I learned all about the letter S today. That I'm the self serving sellout, who's giving our environment a super sly drink, all for a sports car and a salary.
We're playing the Bulls!
The Celtics are playing the Bulls. You...didn't make the team.
She knows.
She does?
Act dumb.
"We are dumb.
Are you guys nuts?
I'm nuts...this is my partner, pretzels.
What seems to be the problem, ma'am?
S1Two Guys, a Girl and an Apartment
So what am I supposed to do?
Yeah, Pete, I hope you and Melissa really gave some thought to how this is gonna affect Berg.
No, what am I supposed to do when I see her? Around the neighbourhood or at the pizza place. Do I like... hide behind a mailbox? Do I say 'Hello'? Do I try to trip her?
You say 'Hi' to her you big dummy. When she comes in to the pizza place you treat her like everybody else.
Yeah, you just screw up her order and give her the wrong change.
I'm leaning towards Max Larson.
No way! He lives with his mother and drives a van with no windows.
So? He likes his privacy.
Yes, because he's a serial killer!
How can you medical people go around playing fast and loose with something like estrogen? Well, I'm sorry I lied, but you gotta help me. I'm in a bad way. I'm taping Guiding Light, man!
You know Pete, nothing says "I Love You" like a pathetic lack of commitment.
S1Two Guys, a Girl and a Softball Team
Bill, if you sponsor us it will be great publicity for the pizza place.
Yeah, like the 1985 Beacon Street Little Cheeses.
But they made the headlines.
For being the first team in Little League history to lose every game. They were always drowning their sorrows in my free pizzas. They got so fat I had to drive them to the games in groups of three.
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