Bill Compton quotes from True Blood

Sam

[walking into Sookie's room] She's asking for you.

Bill

[turning from the window] Is there something you want to say to me?

Sam

I want you to stay away from her.

Bill

You know Sookie doesn't take kindly to people making decisions for her.

Sam

[pacing the room] You don't need to tell me who Sookie is... I know who she is. I've know a long time.

Bill

Then you'll also know this neither the time nor the place to... mark your territory.

Sookie

[Surprised as Bill wipes off the mirror] Wait a minute. I thought you're supposed to be invisible in the mirror.

Bill

We started many of the mysteries about ourselves centuries ago.

Sookie

What about holy water?

Bill

[Climbing into the bath] It's just water.

Sookie

Crucifixes?

Bill

Geometry.

Sookie

Garlic?

Bill

It's irritating. That's pretty much it.

Sookie

[Pause, smiling] Wow. I feel a little weak.

Bill

Of course you do. I fed on your blood. You should take some vitamin B-12 to replenish.

Sookie

Will I need to do that everyday?

Bill

If you don't mind, yes. And no garlic.

Sookie

Is it always like this?

Bill

No, it is not.

Sookie

I never thought I'd be able to...

Bill

I am honored that you chose me.

[walking in with Malcolm and Liam, to a patron] Well, hey there sugar.

[to Sam] Get us three True Bloods.

Sam

You all need to go somewhere else. This is a family place. Locals only.

Well, we just closed on a place up the road. So that makes us official citizens of Reynard Parrish. We're the new locals.

Sam

My place, my rules.

Discrimination against vampires is punishable by law in the greater state of Louisiana. Personally, I don't give a fuck. But... I... am... thirsty.

Sam

You are not welcome here.

[laughing] That shit only works in a private home.

How nice to see you again, Sookie. You are looking delectable as always.

Sam

[to Sookie] You know them?

Sookie

We've met.

Well, well. It looks like little Miss hold out has given up the goods. Brava. Did he leave enough for the rest of us.

Sookie

I am his!

Well, he is not here, is he? And while Bill is away, Malcolm will always play.

Sookie

Do you think for one second I would ever have anything to do with you! I am sure you were trash while you were alive and now you're just dead trash!

I am going to drain you so slowly, you're going to beg me to kill you.

Terry

JIHAD THIS, MOTHERFUCKER! [running at Malcolm and being thrown across the room]

[to Sam] You are a dead man.

Sam

Maybe. But I'm gonna take one of y'all with me.

Sookie

Sam!

[after grabbing Sam] I'm gonna reach down your throat and yank you inside out by your dick.

Sookie

Hey, leave him alone!

Bill

[entering] Stop this! You're here for me, not them.

Well, we had to get your attention and I do believe it worked.

Bill

What do you want?

You never called me back. Now if I remember what feelings were, mine might be hurt.

Join our nest, Bill. Forget these blood sacks.

Yeah. Mainstreaming's for pussies.

Let's party like we used to, huh. We used to have so much fun.

Bill

[never taking his eyes of Sookie] All right. Let go.

Sookie

What the hell are you doing?

Bill

I should be with my own.

Sookie

But you're not like them. You're better than they'll ever be.

Bill

I am not human, Sookie. I am vampire.

Bill

[showing Sookie where he sleeps] This is where I spend my days.

Sookie

Does anyone ever get in there with you?

Bill

This is not a place for you.

Sookie

So, we can never sleep beside each other?

Bill

No one else knows where I rest.

Sookie

[after they have made love] Doesn't it get old? I mean you've been doing it for over a hundred years. Doesn't it get predictable?

Bill

Not with you it doesn't. You're entirely different. And the beauty and the tragedy of it is that you don't know just how different you are.

Sookie

Please tell me if I'm doing something wrong.

Bill

There's nothing more natural than the act of making love. Who am I to try to change what come naturally to you.

Sookie

But if you could change something...

Bill

I wouldn't change a thing.

Sookie

What's it like to sleep in the ground?

Bill

Well, it's not exactly comfortable. But it is safe. Which if I recall is what the three voice mails required me to be.

Eric

[after Bill has found him in his bathtub, with soft music playing] I texted you three times... Why didn't you reply?

Bill

I hate using the number keys to type... what are you listening to?

Eric

From my younger days. It's really quite beautiful if you know old Swedish. I have a favor to ask of you.

Bill

A favor or an order?

Eric

Depends on how you look at it... Honestly, did you think you could keep her to your self?

Bill

[arriving at Fangtasia] You said you wanted to go out tonight.

Sookie

I did not mean Fangtasia! I mean really, all those pathetic people who come here looking for sex with vampires.

Bill

I know. It's despicable.

Sookie

You know what I mean. So what? Five, ten minutes?

Bill

As long as Eric requires us.

Sookie

You mean as long as Eric requires me! Didn't even have the decency to ask me himself.

Bill

You are mine. He didn't need to ask your permission.

Sookie

He cannot check me out like a library book!

Bill

Unfortunately Sookie, he can. Eric is sheriff of Area 5.

Sookie

Sheriff?

Bill

It's a position of great power among our kind. We do not want to anger him. As long as the requests are reasonable, we should accede to his wishes.

Eric

You killed a vampire, Bill. For a human. What do I do about this?

Bill

What did you have in mind?

Eric

I'll take the girl.

Bill

No!... You can have anyone you want. Why do you want her?

Eric

Why do you want her? You're not in love with her, are you?

Bill

[incensed] Sookie must be protected.

Eric

That sounds like an edict. But it couldn't be, because I would know about that. Admit it... you love her.

Bill

If I had not done what I did, would you have let his disloyalty stand? [about LongShadow]

Eric

Whatever I would have done to LongShadow I would not have done in front of witnesses. Especially not vampire witnesses. Not smart, Bill. Not smart at all.

Bill

[in bed with Sookie after finding the cat dead] Aren't you tired?

Sookie

Every time I close my eyes, I see her face.

Bill

Your cat?

Sookie

Gran. But now that you mention it, Tina's in there too.

Bill

You do know I'm not going to let anything happen to you. That I am here for you, to protect you.

Sookie

What if I don't need to be protected? What if wanting to be protected makes me feel like the helpless little girl I used to be all over again?

Bill

Sookie... all of the things that you need to be protected from, all of the trouble you're in, you are in because of me. So you needing to be protected has nothing to do with you or who you are. All of it is my fault... So why don't you go to sleep and let me be the one to worry about it.

Sookie

Bill, all the trouble I'm in, it's mine. I chose it. I chose it when I chose you.

Bill

Yes, but...

Sookie

Don't you think I wanna blame somebody else? But what happen to my gran and poor Tina is my fault and it's sweet of you to try to take it all from me. But if I let you, I'd be so mad at you, I would never be able to look at you again. And right now your face is the only thing getting me by. So why don't we just leave it on me, okay?

Bill

[pause, accepting] Very well.

Sookie

Night Bill.

Bill

Longshadow was choking the girl and would have killed her.

Magister

So you murdered a higher life form for the sake of your pet? You broke an ancient and fundamental law. You decreased our numbers at a critical time in our history. Very bad. Very very bad.

Bill

Longshadow broke the law first. She was mine and he knew it. He would have killed her and fed from her!

Magister

Hello! Human! Irrelevant. Happens every day!

Bill

He was stealing from Eric.

Magister

[to Eric] Sheriff?

Eric

Yes, Magister. It's true. Longshadow was a thief and a liar. He was hurting my business.

Magister

The business part. That is a serious offense.

Bill

And it was the human who exposed Longshadow. Would you tell him, Eric?

Eric

The only reason the girl was there was because I called her.

Bill

To protect your wealth!

Eric

To protect my wealth, yes. Magister, she is... valuable.

Magister

Humans exist to serve us. That is their only value.

Bill

There are those among us who think differently.

Magister

Do you question my authority? I am the magister. I was trained in the Inquisition and I am the adjudicator for every vampire territory in North America! As the humans say - the humans that you love more than your own kind - back your shit down!

Eric

Bill.

Magister

You haven't bored me. That works in your favor and you seem to be obedient to your sheriff.

Eric

For the most part... When it matters, yes he is.

Magister

The usual sentence is five years in a coffin, chained with silver. During which time your body will waste to leather and sticks, and you'll probably go insane. However, I'm feeling a bit... creative.

Bill

[while he is digging a grave for Jessica, to Pam] Would you leave her alone!

Pam

It's your own fault. You and your insane affection for stupid cows.

Bill

Just go away!

Pam

I wouldn't be here if the magister could trust you.

Bill

I fulfilled the conditions of my sentence! I murdered this innocent girl.

Pam

It was no murder. You drained her blood and gave her yours.

Bill

I fulfilled my loyalty!

Pam

Yes. But you're romantic, you're sentimental. You might do something to keep the little blood bag from joinin' our ranks. I follow my orders. I won't let you stake her before she goes to ground!

Bill

I'm not gonna stake her. I'm gonna set her free.

Pam

You've already set her free. The same as Eric freed me.

Bill

Everyone she's ever known will recoil from her. Everything she has ever loved has been stolen from her.

Pam

Oh please! There's no comparison. You've given that pathetic lump of temporary flesh...

Bill

Jessica!

Pam

The ultimate gift. You're a maker. You're a hero.

Bill

I find myself doubting whether you were ever truly human.

Pam

[smiling] Thank you.

Bill

Jessica, stop!

Jessica

No!

Bill

Stop!

Jessica

Why?

Bill

Because we need to talk.

Jessica

Why?

Bill

Because there are things you must learn.

Jessica

Why?

Bill

Because you are no longer human.

Jessica

Why?

Bill

Because I've been trying to explain to you at length - you have been made vampire!

Jessica

Why?

Bill

Because you were unlucky. Because life and death are unfair. Because of me.

Jessica

I'm so hungry and all you do is talk and I'm starving and you're so mean. You're supposed to take care of me, that's what you said. You suck! [laughs] That's funny 'cause you do suck.

Eric

She's your punishment, not mine. What am I supposed to do with her?

Jessica

Excuse me! I can hear you, mister rude! I wanna go to the bar. I wanna be one of those dancers. I'm hungry.

Bill

She won't listen to me! It will take more time than I have to teach her obedience.

Jessica

I don't obey anybody! Those days are over.

Eric

Can't handle one little girl, Bill? New ones can be like this. Man up my friend. She's not even one night old.

Bill

That is not the issue!

Eric

[to Jessica] You want to stay with you maker, don't you?

Jessica

No, he's a dick! Dick! Dick! Dick!... You're cute. Can I sit in your lap?

Eric

No.

Jessica

Why? Nobody let's me have any fun. Fuckers!

Eric

[to Jessica] Sit down and shut up! Close the door. [turning to Bill] See, you have to be tough with them or they'll walk all over you.

Bill

I am well aware of that, but you can see how she is and there are urgent matters to which I must attend!

Eric

Sookie Stackhouse? Haven't you done enough for her?

Bill

If any harm were to come to her because of my absence, you would be...

Eric

[looks at Bill threateningly] What?

Bill

Without her helpful skills.

Jessica

Let me out! I wanna do something bad!

Bill

I would be in your debt. I would return the favor.

Eric

Oh, yes you will. You most definitely will. Jessica!

Jessica

You don't have to yell at me!

Eric

How would you like to learn how a real vampire feeds?

Jessica

Oh yes sir. Please sir.

Eric

[to Bill] See? It's really quite easy.

Bill

You drank from me. Your blood was replaced with mine. And then I shared my essence with you when we slept together in the ground. [Jessica makes a face at him]

Jessica

Eww...

Bill

No, no, not intercourse!

Jessica

[scoffs] You just said "intercourse".

Bill

It's tradition. It's part of the process. It's--it's magical. Even we don't fully understand how it works.

Jessica

Yeah? Well all I know is, staying out all night like this? My daddy's gonna whup you good. Mister, you better get me home right now. [tries to walk away; Bill grabs her and makes her sit down]

Bill

Jessica, stop!

Jessica

No!

Bill

Stop!

Jessica

Why?

Bill

Because we need to talk.

Jessica

[sarcastically] Why?

Bill

Because there are things you must learn.

Jessica

Why?

Bill

Because you are no longer human.

Jessica

Why?

Bill

Because as I've been trying to explain to you at length, you have been made vampire!

Jessica

[shocked] ...Why?

Bill

Because you were unlucky. Because life and death are unfair. Because of me. You cannot go home. That part of your life is over.

Jessica

[crestfallen] No more momma and daddy? [beat] No more little sister?

Bill

[puts a hand on Jessica's cheek] I'm sorry. No.

Jessica

No more belts. [smiles] No more clarinets! No more...homeschool! No more rules! [Jessica screams and does a happy dance] I'M A VAMPIRE! [exhales] WOW! [walks off]

Bill

No! No! No! There are rules! That's what I've been trying to teach you!

Jessica

Crap on your rules! Crap, crap, crap! Oh I can say anything I want now! Shit, shit, shit, damn, hell, fuck! "Fuck", that's a bad word! Fuck, fuck, fuck! Oh, what's another cuss word so I can say it? I'm a damn vampire! [twirls around]

Bill

If you calm down, I will teach you what being a vampire means.

Jessica

I'm not stupid! I can read! I know what it means!

Bill

Very well then. Why don't you tell me.

Jessica

It means that I don't have to sit like a lady. And I can kill anybody I want. And there's an awful lot of people I'd like to kill.

Bill

No, Jessica, you absolutely cannot kill anybody you want.

Jessica

[pouting] But why?! Why?! I want to kill them.

Bill

With your new powers come new responsibilities. [Jessica moans] You are gonna mainstream like I did. You can almost exactly the same life as you did before, except you'll be awake at night.

Jessica

I want to kill people. And I'm so hungry and all you do is talk and I'm starving and you are so mean! You're supposed to take care of me, that's what you said! And no, you suck! [laughs] That's funny, 'cause you do suck. [Bill grabs a bottle from his four-pack of Tru Blood]

Bill

Here, drink this, it might make you feel more steady, I hope. [Jessica takes a swig of Tru Blood and immediately spits it out]

Jessica

Ugh, it tastes like shit! Why are you doing this to me? Ew!

Bill

It's not bad. You'll get used to it. Try a little more!

Jessica

Fuck, no! And you can't force me, I'll report you.

Bill

Oh really? To who?

Jessica

Oh, to a real vampire who'll kick your ass! You won't let me do anything and I'm so hungry! YOU ARE THE WORST. MAKER. EVER! [weeps]

Sookie

[opening the door and seeing Bill, all better] You're alive?

Bill

Well, technically no. But I am healed. I've fed.

Sookie

Would you like to come in?

Bill

Yes. [enters as she closes the door behind him. Seeing her bruised face, he tries to bite his wrist]

Sookie

No.

Bill

Without my blood, it will take weeks for you to heal.

Sookie

I don't care. After everything I just need to feel human right now.

Bill

I failed you.

Sookie

[smiling] You were willing to sacrifice yourself to save me.

Bill

But if I could...

Sookie

My life is too short for all that. [they kiss passionately]