Richard Hammond quotes from Top Gear

Richard

Some say one of his legs get longer when he sees a pretty lady. And that I haven't done one of these for some time and I've forgotten to make up a second thing. All we know is he's called The Stig!

Richard

OK. A few things to get used to. The gear lever is on the other side of the bike. So at the moment, every time I want to brake, I'm changing gear instead and if I want to change gear, I'm braking. It's not ideal. Brakes are the originals, and surprisingly good. The only trouble is, they're full of asbestos.

Richard

I am now straddling my boyhood hero! No, no, wait. That's not right, no. Between my legs... No.

Richard

No, no accidents in the last five years. [immediately looks at the camera]

Richard

This car is Australian, and the Bathurst is Australia's most famous race. Basically, it's a place where Holden and Ford fans go to have a massive fistfight, and then in the interval, when the paramedics go in, sometimes a car race breaks out.

Richard

I'm sorry, if this car doesn't move you, that is your problem, not the car's. Just the fact!

Richard

That is the worst-looking car in the whole world. I'd rather look at one of your dingleberries.

Richard

I feel like the Pope with his head in a box.

Richard

Earlier on, we built an electric car called Geoff, and he was... a disaster. And I'm not one to apportion blame, but it was entirely James's fault.

Richard

According to Top Gear research, 47% of caravanners enjoy wife swapping. Think what will happen when the keys for this baby come out the pot! Oh, yeah!

Richard

Have we just been abandoned here to die?

Richard

[voiceover] To get away from the creepy crawlies, I decided to seek refuge in my car.

Richard

[opens door] Ooooookay... [Then shuts it again] Guys..!

Richard

I can't remember if I took my malaria pill this morning. If I were a girl, I'd be pregnant, a lot!

Richard

And here it is. I´m genuinely genuinely proud of it.

Richard

(voiceover) But before I had a chance to talk you through, Jeremy arrived. In what appeared to be a block of flats on top of an old Citroen.

Richard

I, um, have had to leave some of the panels at the camp site. Well, all of them, pretty much, and that, um... [we see Richard inside the back of the Land Rover, which has no panels] ...has sort of compromised privacy, rather. [a crowd of men on the beach watch him] Yeah, they're not gonna go, are they?