You know that stuff that they're selling now at the local shop?
I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.
Well, you know, I can't believe it's not butter.
Yeah, well, I believe that is the idea, yeah.
Then yesterday I went to Kirkenden and I bought this other stuff, like a sort of home brand, you know.
And, you know, I can't believe it's not I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.
[pause]
Oh, right. Well, you know I Can't Believe It's Not Butter?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you think it is butter.
No, no. I mean, you know the stuff that I can't believe is not butter is called I Can't Believe It's Not Butter?
Well, I can't believe the stuff that is not I Can't Believe It's Not Butter is not I Can't Believe It's Not Butter. And I can't believe that both I Can't Believe It's Not Butter and the stuff that I can't believe is not I Can't Believe It's Not Butter are both, in fact, not butter. And I believe... they both might be butter... in a cunning disguise. And, in fact, there's a lot more butter around than we all thought there was.
Yeah. You see, I don't know what you're talking about, but I'm sure God does and is intrigued by the whole thing.
[looking at the giant vegetable Jim has grown] Well, bugger me.
You know, it's time the vicar did something about your bad language.
[looks at the vegetable]
LLetitia
Ooh, it is a big bugger, though, isn't it?
(While delivering chocolate eggs in a bunny costume, Geraldine runs into another full sized bunny)
Vicar! What are you doing?
You can't be! I'm the Easter Bunny. I promised Letitia Cropley I'd do it.
Mad bat must have forgotten she'd already asked me. How demeaning! After all the time I've spent on these bloody ears! (Puts his rabbit head back on.)
I must say, you look surprisingly cute in that.
What a sexy little tail! (Gives it a squeeze.)
Stop that! I suggest we keep very quiet about this. You do one end of the village and I'll do the other. It will remain our secret.
Fair enough. Are you sure you don't want to come back to my burrow afterwards for a bit of bunny funny business?
(They turn the corner and gasp as they are confronted with the sight of Owen and about a dozen other Easter Bunnies)
Oh hell! Any more and we'll be able to stage a production of WATERSHIP BLOODY DOWN!!
What are you looking forward to more than anything else at Christmas this year?
Well, my highlights are going to be Jurassic Park and the Queen's Speech, written this year by Ruby Wax, I believe. And what about you?
I'm totally excited about your first Christmas sermon; it, it's just going to be an experience I'll never forget.
Alice, my first Christmas sermon was last Christmas.
Oh, yeah, I forgot. It's not your fault, you probably just chose a boring subject.
What, the birth of Jesus Christ? Otherwise known as the greatest story ever told.
Yeah, first time you hear it. But after that, it gets a bit predictable, innit? Man and woman get to inn, inn full, baby is born in manger, angels sing on high blah blah blah.
You have forgotten to mention that that baby is in fact the Son of God.
Oh yeah, that is a nice twist.
