The Raccoons Season 1 quotes

We're off to the ball game, Lisa! Wanna come?

No thanks, Bentley. I still have to unpack some stuff.

You know, Bert, I think living in the forest is soon gonna be just fine.

Yeah. Just fine.

More pies sir?

Ha ha! I haven't had this much fun since my last tax refund!

We'd make a pretty good team, right boss?

I've seen worse!

Boss? About that little accident with the shredder...

It's coming out of your salary!

You mean... we can have our old jobs back?

Might as well. I wouldn't wish you three messed up meatballs on anyone else!

Bert

I could introduce a new recipe. Dare-deviled eggs! (Laughs)

That sounds about right, coming from a canned ham!

Bert

You're not saying much, Lisa! Uh, how was your day?

Lousy, as if you care.

Melissa

What's wrong, Lisa?

Everything! Everything's wrong! I've got no friends anymore, I miss my school, I HATE THIS HOUSE!

George

That's enough, young lady! We've all got a lot of adjusting to do!

Oh, sure! Everyone else is happy! Nobody cares what I think! None of this would have happened if you hadn't lost your job!

Nicole

LISA!

(runs away sobbing) It's all your fault! And I hope you don't get that stupid job at the station! (slams the door and continues sobbing)

Factory 1-9-8-4 made a lot of money producing this stuff - Sneer Snake Oil!

(Reading the bottle) "Guaranteed to prevent dandruff, aging, arthritis, hair loss and the common cold." Pop, no one would believe all this!

That doesn't matter now! I'm shutting this place down!

Someone shipped this garbage to us, so we ship it to someone else!

But that's not solving the problem! That's just passing it along!

It solves our problem!

There's big bucks in this recycling business, so I only think it's fair that you boys get to do some profit sharing of your own!

That's great boss!

I want you to go through this dump and recycle everything you can.

But... but boss, what about the profit sharing?

You two porkers can share the work, 50/50. And I'll take all the profits!

(To the Pigs) Snag is gonna get the best in show, or you'll get the worst from me!

What are you three doing here?

Drowning! What's it look like?!

Another dead end!

Do you have to use that word?

Hi Pop! What's up?

Larceny! Grand theft pooch napping! That's what's up! I want this plastered all over the front page of your alleged newspaper.

Bert

"Wanted, three pigs for the theft of one blue-point ridgeback retriever. Answers to the name of Snag. Generous reward for any information"?

Oh Lisa...

No way!

You didn't know what I was gonna say!

You wanted me to lend you the money to replace Bert's car and fix the window, so no way!

Bert

So uh, how you feeling Bentley?

How do you think? I just got fired from my very first job!

Bert

Aww cheer up little buddy! You'll be fired from other jobs! (chuckles)

You're not helping Bert...