(After Bert's model plain fails to take off)
Looks like the bomber had a change in orders Bert!
Ralph... I've been ripped off!
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
(Cyril is about to be X-rayed)
Wait, couldn't I just take a written test on this one?
No, no, this is more like a screen test!
You're not hiding from me, are you Mr Sneer?
Hiding? No! Just trying to stay out of your way!
(Preparing a syringe) Now Mr Sneer, this should help.
DDanny
I get three needles a day. I don't even think about it. I just think about, you know, good stuff.
Now there's a good idea. Try that Mr Sneer.
(As he gets the injection) Well there is money and gold and stocks. Bonds are nice too, and corporate takeovers.
Good news Bert! I got the name of the president of the company who sells the remote bomber!
And from everything we could find out about this guy, he's a real weasel!
His name is Milton Midas.
Milton Midas (on the TV) Milton Midas here, your man of a million miraculous minor steals! This fabulous Midas forest has just become available and it's gotta go friends, take a look at the Midas workmanship on these Midas trees, solid Midas wood, so run, walk or crawl down here tomorrow for the auctioning off of these incredible Midas acres! Just who am I to be offering such a dynamite Midas deal? Well, I'm the man with the golden touch - Mr Milton Midas!
Milton Midas?
I know. Isn't television great?
POPig One
Oh no! We forgot to close the land deal!
Madcap millionaires, the party's not over!
PTPig Two
Oh, the party's over alright!
POPig One
Never mind our lives!
Oh golly gosh gee whiz, have I missed something?
DDanny
Mr Sneer! What are you doing?
I'm checking out.
DDanny
Why?
Because they want to operate on me, that's why.
DDanny
Are you chicken?
Listen kid, you have any idea what those doctors do to you?
DDanny
Oh sure. I've had operations before.
You have?
DDanny
Yeah. And they're not all that bad. Well, the first time is always a bit scary. I guess I wasn't that brave but...
DDanny
If you're brave enough to climb out there, you're brave enough to handle and operation! Trust me.
I'll be on my way as soon as I get my refund like it says in your ad - "Money cheerfully refunded if not completely satisfied".
I said that?
That's right!
Why those idiotic oinkers! If I lose this land, I'll fire them... out of a cannon!
Oh, do something Lloyd!
POPig One
What can I do?
PTPig Two
Do what the boss would do if he were here!
He'd get really mad if he were here.
POPig One
My bid certainly made an impression on that big shot, didn't it?
PTPig Two
Oh it certainly did! And when the boss hears about this he'll impress us!
Six feet into the ground.
(Cyril is livid at the Pigs)
POPig One
Careful! Think of your stress level boss!
PTPig Two
Oh yeah, you don't want to end up back in the hospital!
Hospitals don't bother me anymore but you clowns do! And when I get to the bottom of this, that's just where you'll be - in the hospital! Come back here you pork rinds! Stop!
POPig One
Run for it boys!
Ah Nicole, what if I bomb? What if I don't get the job? I wish none of this had ever happened.
Well it did happen, and we'll get through it. We're all going to be out there rooting for you George.
WMr. Willow
Hello boys! What can I do for you?
POPig One
I'm glad you asked Mr Willow. As a result of our recent cutbacks, we find ourselves available for gainful employment.
PTPig Two
Or we could use a job.
LLisa
(on the phone) Oh, everything's fine! I guess...
I'm heading off to the Raccoondominium. Want to come along?
LLisa
(to Nicole) No thanks, Mom, have fun! (on the phone) Sorry about that. Uh, how's the basketball team doing without me? They won? Gee, that's... that's great! You have to go? Oh, no-no, I've got lots to do. Say hi to everybody for me. Bye.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Raccoons pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.