Michael quotes from The Good Place

This meeting of the Joint Council of Afterlife Affairs is called to order. Let's make this quick, kids. I just started re-watching "The Leftovers". Honestly, when I found out that Carrie Coon was never nominated, I almost erased 2% of humanity. Michael? Update?

Michael

Things are going fairly well. A new crop of humans just passed their tests. Among the notables who got in: Roberto Clemente, Zora Neale Hurston, Saint Thomas Aquinas...

Chidi

YES!!

Michael

Eighth-century Sufi mystic poet Hazrat Bibi Rabia Basri, and Clara Peller.

Michael

She was the "Where's the beef?" lady.

Ohhhh.

Michael

"Where's the beef?" lady got in, SO...that's fun. Honestly, our biggest problem is that we need more architects and actors.

Well, sorry, but these younger demon actors have no dedication to their craft. They think they can just start acting. They have to learn that acting is reacting, and reacting is pre-acting. But pre-acting? Well...that's just being.

Okay, take it down a notch, Daniel Day-Lewis. Shawn, what you got?

Shawn

Well, I'll begin by saying that this new system stinks, and Michael stinks, and we should throw this all in the garbage and go back to the way it used to be when everyone was tortured.

Michael

There's still some bumps in the road, but this system is good and it's working. Come on, admit it.

Shawn

I will never...ever, ever, ever, ever...ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever...ever, ever, ever, ever, ever...ever, ever, ever ever, ever...ever...EVER admit that.

Michael

I know, buddy. I know.

Chidi

Hey there, Doug.

Hi.

Chidi

Having fun?

I've had so much chicken!

Chidi

It's probably good you chose your young body.

Yeah.

Michael

How are you doing?

I'm okay, Michael. How are you?

Michael

Well, I'm sad, and I know you're the most advanced being in the universe, but I feel like I need to tell you: it's okay if you're sad, too.

I know. And I am a little, but also, I know this is the right time for him to leave. I really am okay, I promise.

Michael

Will you come talk to me if you're not?

Always.

Michael

I'll say this to you, my friend, with...all the joy in my heart, and all the wisdom in the universe: Take it sleazy.