A character in The Games
Played by Bryan Dawe
The Games · 166 quotes
3rd most-quoted character in The Games: in 38 of its 166 quotes
Most scenes with: John Clarke (24), Gina Riley (8), Nicholas Bell (3)
Look, look, Bryan, Bryan. If KFC gets, say, Carl Lewis to endorse their product the potential for confusion in the marketplace is absolutely enormous.
Bryan DaweOh come on, how? What are they going to do? Get Carl Lewis to hold up a chicken and say "This is a hamburger"?
Bryan Dawe[Brandishing wallet as official badge] Federal Police.
[Brandishing wallet as official badge] Mittagong Regional Library.
Look, they're coming from somewhere up in the sticks, they just want to present their proposal for the opening ceremony, alright?
Bryan DaweNicholas, you've just finished telling me that the contract for the opening ceremony has been awarded to a German company.
Yes, Einfahrt. [To camera] Nobody knows that yet, alright?
Bryan DaweWell, it's academic, isn't it? You've already awarded the contract!
No, you will have to see them.
Bryan DaweBut there's no possible reason for seeing them Nicholas, you've awarded the contract!
That's precisely why you have to see them!
Bryan DaweWhy, because you've awarded the contract to the Germans?
Yes!
Bryan DaweI don't believe it.
Well, things have got to be done fairly and kept above board. [Patronisingly] There's the chap.
Bryan DaweNow, you have all these schoolkids swarming into the stadium dressed as luminous glow-worms?
Not yet.
Not now, not yet. They're not in until just gone dark.
Yeah.
Cause they won't glow otherwise, and they'll need to glow.
Course they will, with everyone wanting to wave to mum and dad up in the stands.
What were you thinking Bryan, they're glowing!
Bryan DaweOkay, glowing kids - after.
I do tell you though, you cannot get horses to form Adelaide churches. God, we tried. Can't get them to be pointy!
Shame.
Bryan DaweThat is a shame.
We could do Tazzy instead.
Bryan DaweJohn, don’t fight what you can’t change.
That’s the ANZAC spirit, isn’t it Bryan?
[Gina runs past towards the bathroom]
What’s wrong with her?
Bryan DaweBig night with the Albanians.
Really? She went out with an Albanian delegation. What does that mean?
Bryan DaweShe set fire to one of their wigs.
Bryan DaweWhat happened in Melbourne? What legacy did they have?
As a result of the Olympics?
Bryan DaweYes.
Slums, by and large. They built a whole lot of accommodation out at West Heidelberg. It’s still there, I think. You still hear it mentioned from time to time. "Police later found the vehicle abandoned at West Heidelberg." "Police are anxious to speak to the population of West Heidelberg."
Can you get Ian Barrundi to come?
Bryan DaweIan Barrundi? Yes.
Get him to come.
Bryan DaweWe’d need a weight lifter.
Well, we need a recently retired, top flight international athlete.
Bryan DaweWho’s as thick as pig shit.
He’s very good in a meeting, Bryan. He’s excellent in a meeting.
Bryan DaweHe knows nothing about corporate law and doesn’t know what the Minister’s deal is.
The Americans don’t know that.
Bryan DaweIt’ll take me an hour and a half to brief him.
He doesn’t need to say anything. Go and ring him. He doesn’t need to say anything. I just want him to be there. Tell him to dress for church and be in attendance.
Thank you. John, can I ask what work has been done up to this stage by your people on this question? You see, what I am thinking is there maybe a detailed study already undertaken on the Los Angeles public transport system and how it worked for them at the ’84 Games. That sort of thing would give us a lot of information. Is that available at all?
Bryan?
Bryan DaweNo.
It hasn’t been done at all?
Bryan?
Bryan DaweNo.
Is there a reason for that?
Bryan?
Bryan DaweThey don’t have a public transport system in Los Angeles.
I had a proposal for the naming rights to the mascots this morning.
Millie, Olly and Syd?
Uh-huh.
Bryan DaweAny good?
Not bad if you don’t mind them being called Big Mac, Fordie and Microsofty
Yes, we are embarked upon what is undoubtedly the greatest event ever mounted in Australia.
Bryan DaweOf any kind.
Yes, Bryan, yes, probably the greatest event ever mounted in any Australia of any kind.
Of any kind in Australia.
Pardon?
Why have we issued tickets that don’t fit the little tickets slots?
Bryan DaweCan I just handle that? Can I just say that the ticketing system that we implemented for these games is absolutely superb? If it had come off we would have been national heroes. I mean, it was a brilliant idea.
[The room erupts in laughter]:
What went wrong?
Bryan DaweWe got caught.
Morning, Bryan. Are you aware that we had a transport meeting this morning?
Bryan DaweYes, it was cancelled.
Yes, good. Thanks, I worked that out, Bryan. There’s nothing like sitting in someone’s empty office for 40 minutes to focus the mind, is there?
[John is throwing the day's post into the bin]:
Bryan DaweAh, John? Any for me in there?
No, Bryan.
Bryan DaweHow do you know? You’ve just chucked it all out.
Most of it was from the public.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Games pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
