[Later that evening at the apartments, the Casagrandes are holding an intervention for Hector to discuss about his gossip addiction]
[enters excitedly] Hola, I'm home! Ho, you guys will never guess what Vito wears to bed! [only sees his family, all super mad at him] What? You already know about the bunny pajamas?
No, Abuelo. This is a convention.
Actually, Carl, the word is "intervention."
RRosa
Hector, your chisme addiction is embarrassing your family.
And making the customers mad.
You're a chismoso. And by that, I mean, you're the biggest gossip in town.
What? [not seeing the problem] I'm not a gossip. Anyway, as I was saying… Vito wears his pajamas with huge bunny ears! [the family grumbles at him; realizes what he's doing] Okay, now I see it. I didn't even know I was doing it. I'm sorry. I never meant any harm.
RRosa
I know, mi amor, but when you talk about people behind their backs, it can be hurtful.
Ah, you're right. As of today, I am swearing off chisme. Right after I tell you about Mr. Scully's toupee. [snickers, then Ronnie Anne shoves a pillow in his mouth to shut him up]
[squawks] This won't be easy.
Don't worry, Abuelo, we can come by the mercado and help you cut the chisme.
[entering the living room with Rosa; impressed with her daughter and Sid's dancing] That was great, girls. Your hard work practicing these dances all week has really paid off.
RRosa
Even I know the moves now. Hip, hip, double heart fingers.
No one can resist a 12 is Midnight bop. It's a fact.
And now we've got every one of 12 is Midnight's signature moves down. [she and Sid hold each other and jump while squealing] I still can't believe you won us the chance to be extras in their next music video! Talk about luck.
Luck and about 300 boxes of 12 is Midnight After Dark Cocoa Cereal.
Why does Abuela get to pick what we do today? [gasps] Can I pick?
No. It's Abuela's turn. Rosa, get in here before these bobo's steal your pick!
RRosa
Coming! Who's ready for a fun day of birdwatching in the woods?
RRosa
Birdwatching is my new favorite hobby, and I want to see how many different pajaros we can spot from my book, "Cuckoo for Birding."
Abuela, I don't know. Birdwatching sounds, uh, how do I put this nicely? Super boring.
[Great Lakes City woods; Rosa leads the way while the others start sweating from the heat]
I think I'm literally melting.
Melting? I'm literally molting!
So Abuela, where are these famous birds you wanted to see?
[shrugs] Well, guess they're not here. Okay, come on, let's go.
RRosa
Wait! We haven't even tried all the bird calls that I learned. [squawks, but summons accidentally summons Bitsy] Whoops. That's the elephant call. [tweets, but accidentally summons two hipsters] Sorry, that must be the hipster call.
H1Hipster #1
Are you guys birdwatching?
H2Hipster #2
[scoffs] We were doing that before it was cool. Huh?
[clinging onto one of them] TAKE US WITH YOU!!!
RRosa
Don't worry, kids. Birdwatching takes time.
[acting] Hey, Abuela, look! [points up to a tree] Is that one of the birds from your book?
[Sergio is seen sitting on the tree branch, disguised as a woodpecker]
Sergio, start pecking the tree!
You want me to bang my head against a tree? I'm not doing it.
Then we're not going home.
[Sergio groans annoyingly and starts pecking]
RRosa
Strange. Woodpeckers normally peck trees a lot faster.
[noticing something and points up to a tree; acting] Look, an owl!
[Pan up to Sergio, disguised as an owl]
RRosa
Ooh, I hear they can turn their heads all the way around.
Are you kidding me?! [realizes] I mean, hoot, hoot! [tries to rotate his neck and nearly snaps from the force]
[As Sergio flies around in the sky, disguised as a peregrine falcon]
RRosa
My book says they're the fastest birds on Earth! They can dive at speeds over 200 miles per hour.
How is Sergio gonna pull that off?
I gave him El Falcón's rocket blaster.
[activates the rocket blaster and speeds off; screams] HOLY ELOTE!!! WHERE'S THE BRAKES?! [crashes into the woods, creating an explosion]
[noticing something; acting] Mira, Abuela! Look at that bird!
[Pan over to Sergio on a rock, disguised as a Vogelkop bird-of-paradise, striking poses]
Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.
NNababirdy
By Jove, I don't believe it! A Vogelkop bird-of-paradise? Here in Great Lakes City?!
RRosa
Pretty rare is more like it. My book says these birds are normally only found in New Guinea.
[chuckles nervously] Uh, must be your lucky day, Abuela.
RRosa
Well, I don't think we can top that! This has been a wonderful day! Let's head home. Nice to meet you, Señor Nababirdy.
I'm so sorry. I'm not Jean-Philippe. He moved to Paris and I've been living here ever since.
[noticing the canned corn sofa] That's where my canned corn went. [screams as the swarm of bees resume attacking him]
There's so much chaos at home, and I felt like I needed my own space. Please don't use the super-chancla!
[Rosa and Maria laugh hysterically]
[chuckling uncomfortably] Why are we laughing? I'm scared.
RRosa
Bobby, you should've talked to us.
You're an adult now, and you can make your own decisions, mijo.
Oh, really? What about when Tío Carlos went to college and you moved into his dorm with him?
RRosa
That was his idea! He wouldn't stop crying and begging me to stay.
You were so right, babe. And I can't wait for you to visit my new place!
Me, too! You're so grown up, boo-boo bear. [giggles] Love you! [gives him a kiss]
Love you, babe. [kisses in return and ends the call] ♪ All grown up, taking care of myself ♪ [yawns] Time for mimis. [goes to sleep]
RRosa
[watching Bobby through monitor with other monitors showing her familia in a secret lair] Sweet dreams, mijo. [wipes a tear from her eye and leaves the lair, revealing it to be hidden in the apartment complex's water tower]
[End of episode… and the series]
The Casagrandes · 329 quotes
