Dean Winchester quotes from Supernatural

Dean

A little FYI. Bobby's officing out of the john these days.

Sam

Ahh - awkward.

Sam

Could've been a monastery. Monks get up at 4am to pray.

Dean

Ohh - Can't get laid, can't sleep in. That's a freaking tragedy... Okay, so alpha's camping next to a monkey house

Emily

What now:

Dean

We get you somewhere safe, circle back and ginsu these leeches.

Emily

What's a Kardashian?

Dean

Just another bloodsucker.

Dean

Alright Sam - tap the keg.

Sam

Here?

Dean

Yeah Sam, look around; it's freaking Woodstock, everyone's hopped up on the brown acid. We don't need the song and dance. Give him a little prick.

Alpha Vampire

Right, right, your flesh is crawling. All you want to do is kill me now. You hate having to wait and come back, and try again...

Dean

Pretty much. I wouldn't leave that head to close to that body for too long.

Alpha Vampire

See you next season.

Dean

Looking forward to it.

Sam

We should call Castiel.

Dean

Dude, on my car...he showed up naked...covered in bees.

Sam

Yeah, I am not really sorry I missed that.

Dean

Well, I guess if we can't find a righteous bone in a friggin' nunnery crypt.

Sam

All right. Here – listen to this. Sister Mary Benedict, uh, taught the learning-impaired and died at age 23.

Dean

Eh, it's a little young. Find someone who's had time to cook.

Sam

Okay, well, there was, uh... here – Sister Mary Eunice. Uh, fed the poor, became Mother Superior at age 60.

Dean

Sounds political. Power corrupts.

Sam

Right. Um... listen to this – Sister Mary Constant, 83 years of quiet, humble nun-like goodness. What do you think?

Dean

Wow. I want to be more righteous just reading this.

Sam

Exactly.

Dean

All right, well, I lay odds on her. Here we go. Well... let's bone this nun.

Dean

Sorry.

Dean

So, Cas, what's, uh, what's, uh, what’s the word?

Castiel

Well, Dean, I've been thinking. Monkeys are so... clever, and they're sensible in that they leave the skins on the bananas that they eat. Is it really necessary to test cosmetics on them? I mean, how important is lipstick to you, Dean?

Dean

Not very. You want to come inside and, uh, tell us what's going on?

Castiel

If we attack Dick and fail, then you and Sam die heroically, correct?

Dean

I don't know. I guess.

Castiel

And at best, I die trying to fix my own stupid mistake. Or... I don't die – I'm brought back again. I see now. It's a punishment resurrection. It's worse every time.

Castiel

I'm not good luck, Dean.

Dean

Yeah, but you know what? Bottom of the ninth and you're the only guy left on the bench... Sorry, but I'd rather have you. Cursed or not. And anyway nut up, alright? We're All cursed. I seem like good luck to you?

Dean

What?

Castiel

Well.. I don't want to make you uncomfortable, but I detect a note of forgiveness.

Dean

Yeah well, I'm probably gonna die tomorrow so... [Dean makes a face as if to say why not]

Castiel

Well, I'll go with you. [Dean looks at Cass] And I'll do my best.

Dick Roman

And good on you! Pulling that together – A-plus.

Dean

Oh, you don't think this'll work, do you? You trust that demon?

Dick Roman

You sure I'm even me, Dean?

Dean

No but he is [indicating Castiel] See here's the thing about dealing with Crowley: he will always find a way to bone you.

Dick Roman

Did you really think you could trump me?

Dean

Honestly? [pulls out the real bone] No. [Castiel holds Dick's head in place from behind and Dean stabs him through the neck] Figured we'd have to catch you off-guard!

Castiel

Wake up. [Dean opens his eyes and sits up.] Good. We need to get out of here.

Dean

[Standing up] Where are we?

Castiel

You don't know?

Dean

Last I remember, we ganked Dick.

Castiel

And where would he go in death?

Dean

Wait. Are you telling me...?

Castiel

Every soul here is a monster. [There is a rustling in the trees.] This is where they come to prey upon each other for all eternity.

Dean

We're in Purgatory? How do we get out?

Castiel

I'm afraid we're much more likely to be ripped to shreds.

Dean

[Turns and sees two large creatures with red eyes watching him.] Cass, I think we better – [Castiel has disappeared.] Cass?

Sam

Maybe we should split up. Ask around. See if anyone's seen him.

Dean

Yeah. Asian kid. Yay high. At a university. That should be easy.