Bobby Heenan quotes from SummerSlam

With Butch, Luke and Andre in there...which one is Larry, Darryl, and Darryl?

I'm not sure Hawk even knows where he's at right now. Whether it be London, England, or Des Moines, Iowa, he hasn't got a clue.

(On 1-2-3 Kid's first PPV appearance) This is a first! This is a first! This is the first time that Kid's been out past eight o'clock!

(To Vince McMahon) Wrong, wrong, wrong, tuxedo breath!

He hit him so hard he knocked three zits off his cheek!

Cheating is only cheating when you get caught, and bragging isn't bragging when you can do it.

That's Bruce Hart right? Did he ever play a banjo in the movie Deliverance?

(On Undertaker vs. Giant Gonzalez) Take out the silver bullets, the wooden stake, and the garlic! Take him home, Giant!

Harvey'll knock you out in a minute! (Harvey Wippleman charges and is instantly knocked out by Paul Bearer) He slipped, he lost his footing.

(On Undertaker) He's back to the tomb! He's back to the crypt! He's back to his box of dirt! He's looking at the urn! He's got his power back! He's got Paul Bearer back! There's gonna be trouble for everyone in the World Wrestling Federation!

(After Yokozuna is knocked out by Lex Luger's forearm and loses to Luger by countout) I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! HE IS OUT! HE IS STILL OUT! THE CHAMPION IS OUT! WILL SOMEONE PLEASE HELP HIM? PLEASE HELP HIM! HE IS OUT! HE IS STILL OUT! MY GOD!

Now, Mr. Perfect, it was less than ten days ago that you accepted the challenge from the Texas Tornado to defend the Intercontinental Championship. Have you ever prepared for a title defense on such short notice?

To be perfectly honest with you, I haven't. You see, being absolutely perfect does have its problems, because when you're a perfect Intercontinental Champion, challengers are few and far between. And let's face it, I'm perfect in every way — the perfect body, the perfect mind, and the perfect record.

Mr. Perfect, is it wise to accept a challenge from someone you know so little about?

Wait a minute, pal, I'll handle this one. You see, I know a lot about this Texas Tornado, because if you've seen one, you've seen 'em all. And you know why they call you the Texas Tornado? Because you've got your head in the clouds, and if you've got your head in the clouds, pal, you don't have your feet on the ground! You see, a Texas tornado never really does any damage, because you can spot one coming a mile away. Sure, they may look ferocious, but all they're really good for is kicking up some dust and (laughing) maybe turning over a few mobile homes in some hick trailer park on the Panhandle.

Remember this! Nobody beats Mr. Perfect!

Nobody.

If your parents were here Piper, they wouldn't let you know that you were gone.

I'm not going to kill you for that remark, Boobs. I'll let you live with it for the next two and a half hours.

I heard a rumor that your mom and dad ran away from home.

Will you stop?!

You know, Piper used to come home from school and find out that his parents had moved.

Will you stop?! I'm not going to tell you again or you'll be out of here.

Concerned look on the face of Stu and Helen Hart.

You know why they're concerned? They snuck in! They scared the usher away.

Will you be serious?!

Stop it now Bobby!