Shaxs quotes from Star Trek: Lower Decks

Shaxs

This is the best day of my life!

In the Nexus, it's always Christmas.

Shaxs

You all got the briefing. No weapons. These Mugutus are endangered, and their genitals are sensitive to phaser fire.

New shift on deck. Get out of my chair! And go clean up Airlock 17. Pakled did something unspeakable in there.

It's NAKED TIME!

Shaxs

If they wanted us to stack these, then why are they shaped like this?!

Shaxs

Strange how they broke off and retreated, though. Klingons typically want to die in battle. Honestly, I get it.

Shaxs

You think I had time for anything other than resisting?! Fighting fascism is a full-time job!

Lieutenant Shaxs

(upon seeing Deep Space 9) Tacky Cardassian fascist eyesore!

Lieutenant Shaxs

[briefing a security team about to fend off a Breen boarding party] The Breen don't take prisoners; don't try to negotiate! Defend yourselves at all cost!

Shaxs

Barstools hurt my back.

Andy Billups

You're not sitting on them right.

Shaxs

Not sitting on them right? I've killed better men for less.

Andy Billups

No, you haven't.

Shaxs

Well, I've threatened to kill better men for about the same.

If we fire on them, it's an act of war.

Shaxs

I advise we fire on them!

Shaxs

Phasers locked onto their warp core, captain. Please, please let me shoot their warp core! I have been very good this month!

Captain Carol Freeman

Evasive pattern Sulu-Alpha.

Shaxs

OH, COME ON!

Shaxs

Great work nerve-pinching those Vulcans, baby bear. Who knew you'd be better at it than they are?

Sam Rutherford

I did? But I don't know how to nerve-pinch.

Shaxs

Ha! Tell that to Spock and Spock.

Shaxs

There's a reason we don't anyone how we come back.

I know. You can't tell me because I'm just an ensign.

Shaxs

It's nothing to do with rank, son. We're sparing you dark truths about scientific depravity that would haunt you for the rest of your days. Once you know, you can never go back to being the man you were before.

Works for me! Tell me, tell me!