Beckett Mariner quotes from Star Trek: Lower Decks

Red alert! A Pakled party, and I wasn't invited?

Beckett Mariner

[exhales in relief] Hoo! It's about time you showed up, Will.

Mariner! This makes us even.

Brad Boimler

[to Mariner] You know Riker??

Beckett Mariner

Yeah. Who do you think hooks me up with all my contraband? Dude is flush with Romulan ale and–

I'm sorry, what was that?

Uh, heh...uh, we're still at Red Alert! Target those ships and fire!

We're talking about this later. [Riker sheepishly smiles]

Hey, how about you buy me a drink? You know, since we're even? Remember? The thing with the aliens where I saved your ass?

Beckett Mariner

We are not even, and we don't use money. What happened to you, man? You used to be sharp.

Beckett Mariner

Boimler, you can't keep ducking me forever! It is a really small galaxy out there. Sooner or later, I'm gonna run into you, and I'm gonna feed you to an Armus! You hear me?!

Hey psycho, keep it down. We're trying to sleep!

Beckett Mariner

Oh shut up, Jen!

Captain Carol Freeman

I can't even begin to imagine how I'm going to replace [Shaxs]

Beckett Mariner

Well, wherever he is, I'm sure he's full-throat screaming in someone's face and ejecting a warp core.

Captain Carol Freeman

I'd like to think you're right.

Captain Carol Freeman

How much contraband have you hidden on my ship?

Beckett Mariner

I don't know. A lot!

Beckett Mariner

Maybe I should apply to the Sacramento.

Brad Boimler

I don't know. They might be looking for someone a little less criminally insubordinate.

Jack Ransom

We're out of options!

Captain Carol Freeman

Then I need someone to make me some.

Beckett Mariner

Me? What am I supposed to do? I don't know these guys!

Captain Carol Freeman

Do what you do best. I need a dangerous, half-baked solution that breaks Starfleet codes and totally pisses me off. That's an order.

What are you doing?

Beckett Mariner

Cardio. Plus a little strength training.

So you work out by staging Cardassian prison breaks?

Beckett Mariner

Yeah. What do you do?

Uh, yoga?

Beckett Mariner

Wow, how unique!

Jack Ransom

Mariner? What was I doing?

Beckett Mariner

You were trying to eat the ship, sir. I had to apply concentrated force to your neutral zone.

Beckett Mariner

Love you, Mom.

Carol Freeman

Love you, too. Never disobey me again!

Beckett Mariner

I do what I want!

You're abandoning your fellow officer?

Beckett Mariner

Yeah, well, he did it first.

Beckett Mariner

So your brains aren't going to melt?

Nope. I mean, not from the implant. But we're in Starfleet so who knows what's going to happen next week.

Beckett Mariner

We need to get to the engine room, and disable the defenses. For us to make it out of here, we're gonna have to travel into the belly of the beast-

Jet Manhaver

Quiet. I've got a safer plan.

Beckett Mariner

What? No, you don't cut off my badass plan!

Jet Manhaver

I'll try to come up with a plan.

Beckett Mariner

Enough with this whole textbook leader routine. We're not buying it.

Jet Manhaver

I'm just trying to step up here. You're the one with the act. The whole dive-in headfirst thing. You're just desperate to be seen as some kind of renegade hero.

Beckett Mariner

No, I'm not! Diving in is just how I work best.

Jet Manhaver

And I like to think things out. Sorry if that comes off as all 'textbook' to you.

Beckett Mariner

Actually, usually Boimler leaves that one open for me. He has issues with communal nudity.

Jet Manhaver

Well, I'm not him and he's not here.