What I need is a card that says 'Why is there a man in a barrel?'
Can't help you there.
S2 E6Birds
[Attempting to talk to the fishermen.] Man, in barrel? Man, down there in barrel? Why?
[Bomber snorts.]
[Pointing at Bomber.] Shut up!
Sorry Buff.
Haven't you had enough action for one day?
Nah never, just ahh, I think I pulled a muscle boarding that FFV I thought I might stretch it out.
Oh no I know what you're doing, trying to drive me crazy.
Is it working?
No, it's having absolutely no effect whatsoever.
Oh, well I guess I'm safe just to keep doing it then.
Just don't blame me if I can't think about anything else.
He kissed me.
He kissed you by accident?
I'm aware that you and ET have feelings for each other. Now I don't want to hear about that because I know that nothing would ever happen on the ship. You are too mature and professional for that to happen.
Thank you.
[When he's just been told his leg will be amputated.] At least we'll always get a car space.
You don't have Bird Flu, Spider.
What, are you a pathologist? They were on the Hammersley for a very long time.
We're disinfected.
Charge, those germs can live for a very long time.
What, are you a pathologist?
At least you didn't contract bird flu.
S2 E7Hidden Agendas
You didn't tell me where you were going?
I didn't know.
Not very professional.
Sir we're heading home, we don't need another debriefing.
It's not a debriefing.
It sounds like one.
Well, can't I be concerned?
Yeah sure, just don't make it sound like a debriefing.
S2 E8Heart Of Glass
And I think that's my pillow calling...
Call the hands, call the hands, wakey, wakey, wakey.
I guess that's not my pillow calling after all.
Sorry Ma'am.
It's a choice of fruit salad or fruit salad.
No way.
I would steer clear if I was you though mate, this stuff with soften your arteries.
[Sarcastic laugh.] Where is the cook?
That looks like horse...
Don't say that.
Well okay, it looks like the product of a horse that ate some birthday candles.
With these things it's the thought that counts.
Well at least it will taste good.
Well actually it's just a bit frozen.
How long has it been out?
About 45 mins.
You should have taken it out last night.
Yeah I know, thanks for that.
She’s not here, it’s just fruit and salad.
Good. Need you all in the junior sailors’ mess.
Is there a problem?
No, we’re gonna sing ‘Happy Birthday’.
He’s getting weirder.
S2 E9Shadow Line
[The crew on the Bridge are staring at the EOD watching Spider kiss Carly Walsman on Ray Walsman's yacht.]
NCNav and Charge
Oh oh oooooo ooh wow wooow!
Oh recording recording!
Spider hasn't got a chance against her.
Guys, some of us are trying to work here.
RO, shoosh.
[Kate walks in.]
Ahh, have we found something of interest on the EOD?
No, just perving on the cruiser.
What's Webb done with his life jacket?
Ummm well he.....
You know Spider, he's just...Spider.
Right
It’s just about being at sea.
Yeah, skippering a giant plastic bath toy.
You sound upset, X. Could it be that you’d miss me?
I just think that… it would be a terrible waste for the navy.
Well, I’m sure the navy would appreciate your concern. [Pause.] If I wasn’t in the navy it would open up certain other possibilities.
[Kate looks away silently.]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Sea Patrol pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.