Rick Prime quotes from Rick and Morty

If you're seeing this, you're me - except, you know, less. But you acted like you were better, so I killed your beloved Diane. Partly to devastate you, mostly so I only have to record one message. Some of you may have noticed that it's not just your Diane that's gone. She’s also been erased from every universe across infinity. And you might be wondering why.

I'd rather hear how.

Diane was wiped from all existence by the Weapon Too Cool for a Name...

The Omega Device.

...known to inferiors as the Omega Device.

I heard the name from an inferior.

Honestly, wife guy? I do miss when it was just us -- the only two Ricks who actually invented portal travel. Anyone else keyed up to arrive later? Like your car?

I can see why you hate him.

And she sounds like our wife! Li-- Like in a fucked-up robot way, but that's definitely her voice. You sentimental little fella!

I upgraded this thing, by the way. This new version can fire more than once. So now I can erase your family, one by one, until you finally learn your lesson! Which you won't, so then I'll kill you too... I'll do that the old fashioned way. Okay, family-killin' time! Let's start small - still family, though.

Where am I?! Two Ricks?! Where's my wife?! I was just with my wife!

Uncle Slow!

What the-- "Uncle Slow"? Slow Mobius?

Yeah, this one hurts me, too.

[slow motion, tearing up] NOOOOOOOOO!

[mouthing in slow motion] What the fuck?

Kind of the worst possible time to use his powers! He just made the death happen slower!

I'LL KILL YOU! [charges Rick Prime]

Okay, I think I'm getting the pic-- [gets shocked by a device linked to his forehead] OW! Frying my backups. Smart. So you're, like, an "Evil" Morty? A clever one? [gets shocked again] OW! All right, never been a sidekick guy, but I'm starting to see the value. You want a job? We could be like Batman and Robin.

Eh. I don't need a Robin.

[gets shocked again] Okay, seriously, what is this? Wha-What, are you gonna "aw jeez" me to death? [as Evil Morty accesses the Omega Device] Oh, you don't want those schematics, buddy. Those are for grownups.

Uh-huh. [drags in a mangled Rick and revives him]

Oh, isn't this great? Okay, all right, I get it.

[coughs and groans] What? [sees Rick Prime] Oh shit...

[nodding] Mm-hmm. Knock yourself out. [leaves]

Listen! Rick to Rick - he's got the weapon plans. Buddy! Nip this in the bud! He's fourteen, what's gonna happen the next time he gets mad at Grandpa?!

[laughs] Let's do this, then!

You're welcome, by the way! I made you! I showed you infinity! And what did you do with it?! Hang out with my grandson?! Raise echoes of my daughter?! [laughs] What's your life without me?!

Let's find out.

[coughing and laughing] Admit it! You would've been me! I just walked into your garage before you walked into mine! But eventually, you did! YOU LIVED IN MY HOUSE!