(chuckling) Huh? (he sees a light then Rapunzel, Ulf, Big Nose and Vladimir see the light) (a bottle appears and Attila grabs it)
Whoa! I've read about these. Enchanted message bottles. I've always wanted to get one. (she, Ulf, Big Nose and Vladmir walk to Attila) (Attila removes the top of the bottle and the note magically comes out of it)
Ooh. Your lucky day. (tells Rapunzel) It's for you.
Yes! (gives the guitar to Ulf) (Attila gives the note and the bottle to Rapunzel) "Rapunzel, help. Cass attacking Spire. Keep this. " And then it ends. Calliope must be in trouble.
EugeneCalliope? Oh, right, the obnoxious, know-it-all, Keeper of the Spire. Guys, put the weapons down already. (tells Ulf, Shorty, Vladimir, Big Nose and a man) It's just a bottle. For crying in the night. (Vladimir, Attila, Big Nose and Ulf walk away) (a key jingles inside the bottle and Rapunzel removes it from the bottle) A key? But for what?
Uh, I don't know. But one thing's for sure. We have to get to the Spire as fast as possible and help Calliope.
Eugene
Uh, sunshine, this is the same Calliope who lied to us and almost got us eaten by a bear-monster.
Look, Eugene, I am not her biggest fan either, but she needs our help.
Eugene
It's just my luck to fall in love with the most compassionate person in the world. (Rapunzel smiles at him)
Fire up the balloon! (Ulf, Big Nose, Vladimir, Shorty and Attila are holding torches)
Eugene
No, guys, she means fly the balloon. (tells Ulf, Big Nose, Vladimir, Shorty and Attila) Not-- Never mind. (Pascal chitters and facepalms)
I chemically treated these thrusters so the flames will burn hotter and longer than any natural flame. You're gonna fly like the wind. (tool bag rustles) Don't touch that. (warns Eugene) Or that. Oh, don't touch that! It's gonna blow! (Eugene screams, wails) Ha, ha, gotcha. Just messing with you. (Pascal chitters) (Pascal squeaks when Eugene is pranked by Varian)
Eugene
I knew that. And you're on my list, frog. (tells Pascal)
Guys, focus. (turns around to tell Pascal and Eugene to pay attention) Look at this. It took us weeks to get to the Spire on foot but thanks to Varian's speed balloon and this direct route, we'll make it in a day. (she, Eugene and Varian see the map) (Eugene looks at Varian and the map)
Eugene
Good job, buddy. (puts his hand on Varian and exits the hot air balloon) (Varian smiles at Eugene)
Oh, wait, this takes you over Kresten Loch. (points to a route) Uh, Kresten Loch? The frozen sea? Miles and miles of deadly wintry expanse? (Pascal squeaks)
Well, if it were for anybody other than you, I'd be worried. Ah! Oh! Who glued my boots to the ground?
Eugene
That's for your balloon prank earlier. (returns while holding a paintbrush and a bucket of glue) Eugene Fitzherbert never forgets. (puts a paintbrush into a bucket of glue then he sees that a paintbrush is glued to his hand and he tries to remove it)
Eugene
You know, Sunshine, this all kind of reminds me... Remember when we used that cauldron to launch the caravan of that rock thing? (Rapunzel shows him the page) Of course you painted a picture of that. (Rapunzel closes her journal and puts it back inside her shoulder bag) Why do you keep drawing me so scared in these? (asks Rapunzel)
I paint it like I see it.
Eugene
I do not look like that when I am scared. I look much more handsome.
Oh, really? (holds the lever and pull it to make the hot air balloon fly faster) (engine surges, wind roars)
Eugene
Whoa!
Eugene
You making fun of me too, frog? (Pascal chitters)
Actually, he's not. Kresten Loch.
Eugene
Pascal? I would like to sincerely apologize. Your previous expression of terror was completely valid.
Eugene
Okay, so we're pretty cold. But at least we're not that guy.
(sighs) If we keep up this pace, we can make it to the Spire by nightfall. (a boomerang whooshing and it sliced a hole to the hot air balloon)
Eugene
We must have come too close to a wave.
Wha-- But we weren't anywhere near a wave. Brace yourself! (holds onto the hot air balloon)
Eugene
Whoa! (holds onto Rapunzel) (he and Rapunzel screaming) (hot air balloon deflated)
Eugene
All in one piece. (he and Rapunzel climb out of the hot air balloon) What do you think took us down? (asks Rapunzel)
I'm not sure. (Pascal squeaks) But I am surethis place doesn't get warmer at night. All right, guys, let's get sewing.
Eugene
They really should put labels on these things. (on the staircase to put the sword back where it belongs) (grunts, then sighs) (sees that Rapunzel still feels down about Cassandra and Zhan Tiri taking the Mind Trap) (he walks down and takes the box from Rapunzel to put it on the wall) Let's get out of here, huh? (asks Rapunzel)
(sighs) I'll be right there. (tells Eugene)
Eugene
You got it. I'll go prep the balloon. (tells Rapunzel then he walks outside) (Pascal chitters when he comforts Rapunzel)
Oh, thanks, Pascal. (touch her pet) (Zhan Tiri returns to the Spire and talks to Rapunzel)
I believe Cassandra promised us a proper introduction. But she failed to deliver. (Pascal growls) (Rapunzel is mad) Didn't she? Frankly, I'm surprised you haven't guessed who I am, seeing as how we've already met, in a way. You see, over the centuries, I've taken the form of whatever suits my needs. A warlock, a demon, even a blizzard.
You're... Zhan Tiri. But that doesn't make any sense. Cass knows how evil Zhan Tiri is. Why would she team up with someone--
Cassandra knows only what I want her to know. I'm playing her, Rapunzel. She has no idea. But she is under my complete control. (walks up to the staircase) Prepare yourself, sundrop. (turns around) An eclipse is coming. And when it does, Corona will become nothing more than dust. (grabs an item from the Spire then vanishes) (ring clangs when it drops) (Rapunzel is shocked then she is mad) (Pascal chitters)
Goodbye Rapunzel and Eugene! (waves to them when they are flying back to Corona) (holds her Baby Kurlock) Sorry you blew it! But it wasn't my fault!
Eugene
(chuckles) Bye! (mumbles) I really can't stand her. (talking about Calliope) (he and Rapunzel walk to the other side of the hot air balloon) Hey, blondie, look, I know today didn't pan out like we'd hoped it would, but you did what you had to do. We'll get Cass back. (he puts his hand on Rapunzel's shoulder) (Pascal squeaks) (Rapunzel smiles) (Pascal chitters)
Actually, Eugene, at the moment, I'm beginning to think Cass is the least of our worries. (tells him) (Pascal squeaks) (Eugene puts his around her when they are flying back to Corona alongside Pascal via hot air balloon)
GCaptain of the Guard
King Frederic, Queen Arianna. As the Captain of the Corona Royal Guard, I have sworn to defend this kingdom against all who threaten it. But as a father, I cannot face my daughter in battle. (takes his helmet off and bow) And so it is with a heavy heart that I retire from my post. (Rapunzel, Eugene, Lance, Maximus, Attila, Vladimir and Ulf gasp) (Pete sighs and fainted then Stan holds him)
Captain, you have served Corona with dignity and pride for so many years. Thank you.
And we respect your decision.
GCaptain of the Guard
As for my replacement, it was a very difficult decision. There are so many qualified guards.
Can we get some water over here?
Have any of these guards ever successfully guarded anything?
GCaptain of the Guard
My replacement has put his life on the line for Corona countless times, and so it is with utmost confidence that I recommend Eugene Fitzherbert.
Eugene
(spit take) Wha-- (shocked)
(laughs) Captain Fitzherbert. I like the sound of that. Yeah, buddy, I have a few outstanding citations, so if those could somehow, you know, disappear? (chuckles)
GCaptain of the Guard
What do you say, Fitzherbert?
Eugene
Me? Captain of the Guard? What is he thinking? (asks Rapuzel when she holds the Gaptain of the Guard helmet)
(chuckles) That you're the perfect choice.
Eugene
Oh. Look, I'm flattered by everyone's support. I really am. It's just that me? Come on. I was a legendary thief. I was Flynn Rider.
Uh, you were Flynn Rider. Now you're Eugene. (Pascal squeaks) (puts the helmet on the bed) Maybe give this Captain thing a shot. (holds Eugene's hands)
Come on! Let's check over here!
Eugene
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hey, what's the commotion?
The princess's crown, it's been stolen. Again. (stop running then tell Rapunzel and Eugene) (walks to the crime)
Oh. Sounds like the kind of thing the Captain of the Guard might handle. (elbows Eugene) Huh? Hmm?
Eugene
For the record, I have not yet accepted that position. (Stan and Pete notice the rope on the roof)
The ceiling. No one would think to stand guard up there. (tells Pete) Whoever did this must be a criminal mastermind the likes of which Corona has never seen.
Eugene
Stan, Pete. I literally committed the exact same crime. (a guard opens the doors then enters)
Sir. We've got a detailed description of the thief. (tells Eugene while showing him the wanted poster)
Eugene
Very funny. Who put you up to this? (takes the wanted poster from a guard to see then turns it around) Oh, nobody wants to own up, huh? Okay. Well, I'll get to the bottom of this. (leaves)
OOld Lady
(sighs) Perfection. (door thuds and Eugene enters holding the wanted poster)
Eugene
It's one thing you get my nose wrong all these years, but this mustache bit is taking things too far. I demand-- (sees the old lady's broken glasses) Oh. This was not intentional, and I can see you are very busy, and I wll just close this door right now. (exits the workshop then turn around) Is it possible that there's another Flynn Rider out there? (heads back to the castle)
Ladies and gents. I give you the roo-- (annoyed when Eugene interrupted him presenting a new invention)
Eugene
I-- I just can't believe how much this guy looks like me. (Max, Varian, Kiera and Catalina are mad at Eugene for interrupting a presentation of a new invention) And he's using my moniker--
(clearing throat) I'll wait. (Max neighs) (Max, Eugene, Rapunzel, Pascal, Kiera, Lance and Catalina turn around) (Eugene puts a wanted poster behind his back)
Eugene
Oh. Ahem. Sorry. (apologizes to Varian for interrupting)
Thank you. I'll start again. I give you... (jumps off the crate) The Rooster. (pulls the rope to reveal a new invention) Or at least, it will be once we put it together.
It doesn't look like a rooster. (tells Varian)
Uh, it's an early warning system. (walks on crate and to the floor) If Cassandra or any other danger threatens the kingdom, this will fire a glowing mortar into the air and alert everyone in Corona. (points to his invention when telling Max, Rapunzel, Kiera, Lance and Catalina)
Great idea. (tells Varian and she puts her hand on him when she and Varian look and smile at each other) Right, Eugene? Eugene? (she, Varian, Max, Kiera, Lance and Catalina turn around to see Eugene) (Max whinnies)
Eugene
Sorry, it's just cheekbones like these, they don't come around twice in a generation, they don't.
Eugene, this is more important than some fake Flynn Rider.
Eugene
Rapunzel, he stole the crown. I mean, only I could get away with that. Look, Flynn Rider has reputation. I refuse to have it tarnished by some hack impostor. I am going after him.
Well, then I'm going with you. (tells Eugene) (turns around)
Uh, uh, hate to nag, but who's gonna oversee The Rooster's installation? All military grade applications require supervision by the Captain himself. (sees Lance putting his finger on The Rooster) Gah! Don't touch that! (pushes Lance's finger away from the invention when mad)
Eugene
Lance, you're acting Captain of the Guard until I get back. (Rapunzel, Pascal, Varian, Kiera, Lance and Catalina see Eugene walking away)
Uh, tut-tut-tut. It's temporary. (walks alongside Max to follow Eugene) (tells Lance that he has a nonpermanent job)
Sweet. A temporary promotion.
(coos) Mm. (holds Rapunzel's tiara and puts her tiara on his head then picks up his bag while laughing when the coins fell out) (makes a coin angel) I'm getting my vest dirty and I don't even care. (stack the coins on top of each other) Hello, beautiful. It's good to be me. (toss sixteen coins) (a coin rolls away) (Eugene spies Brock from a bush)
Eugene
(chuckles) Would you get a load of this villainous scum, huh? (turns his head) Sorting through his booty with his well-manicured hands. (sees Brock putting coins into the pockets) Counting his loot with those piercing almond-brown eyes. (sees Brock as a statue) He makes me sick. (sees that Brock is gone) Huh? Huh? (stops hiding) Aah! He's on to us. Max! (whistles) (Max runs to him) (Brock is running away from Eugene and Max) Come on, Max. This fool is as good as caught. (Max neighs) What do you mean he's faster than me?
(screams and grunts) (grabs a vine and swings on it) Whoa! (screams) (groaning) (Eugene and Max stop when they see Brock swinging around and he knocks him out via Rapunzel's frying pan the he is sent flying to a tree after having a bruised eye) (Rapunzel stops hiding and sees Brock)
Eugene
Not so fast now, is he, Max? (Eugune and Max walk back to Rapunzel and Brock) (Eugene toss Rapunzel's frying pan back to her) (Max blusters) (Eugene jumps off Max) (Rapunzel, Eugene and Max surround Brock) Time for some answers, huh? (Pascal chitters)
What is--? Is this hair? (sees that he is wrapped around Rapunzel's hair)
Yeah, it does the job. (holds her frying pan)
Oh, it's your hair. In that case, hi. The name's Flynn Rider. (Eugene appears)
Eugene
No, it's not. Nope, sorry. Nada. Full stop. You thought you could steal the crown better than me, huh? Did you? Did you? Well, you thought wrong. Can we lock that thing up better, please? Thanks. (hands Rapunzel's tiara to Maximus) (Max whinnines) (Eugene walks to Brock) But let's talk about the real offense. Grand theft to boot. And how do you look exactly like me? (asks Brock)
(laughs) Well, exactly like you? Come on. Don't flatter yourself, pal. (tells Eugene)
Eugene
No, don't flatter-- Myself? No, don't flatter yourself, buddy! Okay? Can you believe this guy? (points to Brock) Big talk from a persona
Eugene
I adapted the persona. There is a difference. (Rapunzel, Pascal and Max are sick and tired of watching Eugene arguing at the impostor) (Max
Eugene
Ooh. Ooh. Who you calling sellout, huh? And you know what? Flynn Rider never had a mustache. (points and taps Brock's chest) So there.
That's because yours truly gave him a long overdue upgrade. Big ears.
Eugene
(gasps) You sir, have come too far. (points to Brock and grabs him by the vest) (Rapunzel uses her hair as a lasso to pull Eugene away)
Yeah, Eugene, relax. (Eugene turns around)
Don't test me, Rider. (points at Brock) Com on, let's get this Flynnpostor back to Corona. (tells Eugene when she walks to Brock)
Eugene
(groans) (walks to Brock)
In the hands of the law again. I'll bide my time. (sees Rapunzel, Eugene and Maximus taking Brock back to Corona) (The Baron leaves)
Why do you always bring people here when you don't even like it yourself? (asks Eugene) (Brock walks inside the pub)
Eugene
I bring people here because I know they will hate it. (walks inside the pub after Brock)
So there I was, you know, I'm surrounded by a battalion of guards, all with their arrows drawn and pointed at numero uno. So I hand over the goods, and I say, "I see your point." (takes his sword out) (Vladimir and Shorty laugh) (Attila chuckles) (Vladimir turns around while points at Brock)
Where did you get this guy? He's great.
Eugene
Great? What--? (Max whinnies) That's not even his story. It's mine. (walks on the table) And he forgot the best part. (laughs) So-- so then the Captain says, "lock him up and throw away the key." And then this is when it gets great. He actually does. I spent weeks in jail while they searched for it, but, man, it was worth it. For the story, you know? (chuckles nervously and sighs) (Attila snoring) (Eugene jumps off the table) But, uh, I guess you had to be there. (walks back to Rapunzel and Maximus)
Well, of course, all that is nothing compared to the time I took on the Earl of Camembert single-handedly.
Eugene, you really need to let your jealousy of this guy go. That's not who you are anymore.
Eugene
Flynn Rider was the closest thing to an identity I ever had, okay? Sure, I was on the wrong side of the law, but I was my own man. In Corona, I'm just Rapunzel's incredibly attractive boyfriend. Or that super, super good-looking freeloader living in the castle. I can't let somebody tarnish my legacy.
Legacy? (scoffs) You were a thief. Behind each stolen item is someone who's upset or heartbroken that was taken. Is that a legacy to be proud of?
Eugene
Well, honestly, it depends on the-- (Rapunzel is annoyed) No, no. Definitely not.
Instead of locking him up, why not try to help him? Wouldn't that be a more rewarding legacy?
Eugene
(sighs) You're right. You're right. You're right, Sunshine. (tells Rapunzel) (walks away to help Brock) (Pascal squeaks)
There is the Eugene I know. (tells Pascal when he squeaks) (Attila and Vladimir laughing) (Eugene walks to Vladimir, Ulf, Attila and Shorty)
Eugene
Excuse me. Ahem. Excuse me? Excuse me? Can I get by? Thank you. (put his hands on Vladmir and Ulf to) (Shorty has a Flynn Rider wanted poster on his face)
Eugene
You helped him escaped?
What? He was funny. (Eugene is mad at Attila, Vladmir and Shorty for letting Brock escape) (Eugene and Rapunzel see that Brock has escaped)
Eugene
Ooh. (bangs his head on the wood) And he did it the same way I would have done it.
Eugene
Trail ends here, huh? Pal? (asks Max)
He's not alone. Who is that? (she, Eugene, Max and Pascal see The Baron abducting Brock to bring him to the hideout)
Eugene
If I didn't know better, I'd say that's... The Baron?
The Baron? Here? (shocked to hear that Stalyan's dad has entered Corona) (Maximus neighs)
Eugene
Yeah. I know. (starts to walk away then Rapunzel and Maximus turn around) Awful, right? However, it solves our problem, doesn't it?
The Captain of the Guard's duty is to protect all of Corona's citizens. (Max whinnies and neighs) (Eugene turns around)
Eugene
I mean, do we know for a fact that he is a citizen of Coro--? (Rapunzel uses her as a rope) Okay, okay. Okay. I'm coming. (Max neighing) (Eugene, Max and Rapunzel jump down) (a crab is shown at The Baron's hideout) That's The Baron's hideout?
Ooh! Talk about your fixer-upper.
Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure · 631 quotes
