Queer Eye for the Straight Guy Season 1 quotes

John, this is the most boring porn I've ever seen. Ever.

And he's already pounding the liquor. An athlete after my own heart.

[about Rob, who is a phone engineer] Now does he climb the poles and stuff?

[holds up an ugly sweater] Now how come he wears this and has a girlfriend, yet I wear these fabulous clothes and I'm single?

Your safety word is 'zucchini.'

Now I'm gonna try something on. [Carson goes into the dressing room with him]

ZUCCHINI! ZUCCHINI!

All right, you look dressed up yet casual. Now let's go try something new. Let's make out! [slips his hand in Rob's pocket and leads him off]

Zucchini!

Don't worry man, I got your back.

Okay then.

Did you break something?

I wouldn't say I broke it. I prefer to say IT broke.

If I didn't know you, I'd try to lure you to a wayside rest area.

We're stressy, we're edgy. Like us running off to Belize together.

Are we really throwing it over?

Yeah.

Okay. Don't throw like a girl.

We're stressing out the straight guy! Wooo!

[ (climbing into a clear cabinet] Look, I'm a collectable!

[about the sheets] It's a full queen. Just like you, Thom!

[about Costco] They've got trampolines. They've got plastic TVs. They have tube socks. They have the best tube socks. Ever.

You guys, look. This is my pile of stuff I don't like. Is it getting too big?