Brian [talking about Michael]: When you think about, what do we even have in common?
Your lives?
S1[Episode 112]
S1[Episode 112]
People who laugh at jokes that make fun of other people, whoever they are, are ignorant and cruel.
S1[Episode 112]
MMatt
I'm Matt.
Course you are. You're always Matt, or Scott, or Todd, or some other wonderful one-syllable name.
MMatt
I'd offer to buy you a drink, but something tells me you don't need another.
Something tells me you might be right! Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go home; it's always nicer to vomit in your own toilet.
S1[Episode 112]
Hey, How's it going?
What? You actually wanna know?
Well, I asked, didn't I?
Everything's fine.
Good. What are you doing tonight?
Huh?!
[laughs] Are... These... Particularly... Hard... Questions? Do you wanna come over after work?
Really? Sure.
S1[Episode 112]
I told her I was an out and proud homosexual and if she didn't like it, she can suck my dick.
S1[Episode 112]
His life was just going to hang there, like some shirt in the closet you never wear.
So you pushed him away.
It was the only course of action.
Yeah, but now he hates you.
That's okay. As long as Mikey's happy.
God, you must really love him.
S1[Episode 112]
Justin [to Brian]: I'm onto you.
S1[Episode 112]
TTy
You... you've got your doubts, don't you? Well, let me ask you a few questions. Do you and your friends obsess about your bodies and the bodies of other men?
[flashback to the gym]
Check out his pecks.
They're like, perfect.
They're like, implants.
[flashes back to Emmett]
TTy
Do your conversations center around trivialities such as movies stars?
[flashback to the Diner]
Did you hear that Cher had her pussy tightened?
Where'd you read that, the Inquirer or Popular Mechanics?
[back to Emmett]
TTy
Are your days and nights spent at the gym and in bars, going home with men whose names you don't even know?
[flashback to Woody's]
So he's coming and he's going, "Fred, Fred!"
Fred! Who's Fred?
[back to Emmett]
TTy
So, maybe you should ask yourself... is this the life I want for me? Is this the life God wants for me? Is there a better life?
S1[Episode 112]
MTMichael [to Tracy]
When you spend your entire life keeping it a secret, who you really are, you learn to stop trusting people and it becomes second nature.
S1[Episode 113]
Can we talk about this later?
Like everything else. I'm gonna go spike the punch.
S1[Episode 113]
MMarian
All of this baby business is making me a little crazy.
Why, because you want one?
MMarian
Because I don't want one.
S1[Episode 113]
Ted [to Emmett]: What's the matter with you?
He's got razor burn on his balls.
S1[Episode 113]
Don't tell me no one's ever had a Big O at the Big Q?
I wouldn't know.
Well, I would. First-hand. And I mean first-hand experience.
Are you saying...
Remember last Christmas when I came to pick you up and you were setting up for Santa's Workshop?
Not Santa. Don't tell me you fucked Santa!
Even I wouldn't do that. I'm not into fat. His elf!
You didn't.
What he lacked for in feet he made up for in inches.
S1[Episode 113]
Don't you ever get tired of being cheery?
You have no idea.
S1[Episode 113]
Shaving Ryan's Privates, Good Dick Hunting, As Big as It Gets... it did get big... [throws videos away] gone!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Queer as Folk (US) pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.