Emily quotes from NCIS

Diane

[furiously] Emily, do you have any idea what kind of trouble you are in, missy?!

Emily

Me? You're the one who's ruining your life!

Diane

I beg your pardon?

Emily

[sarcastically] Uh, www-dot-you-and-dad-suck-together-dot-com? Or are you too desperate at this point to care?

[aside to Gibbs] Apple doesn't fall far from the tree, huh.

Diane

How dare you talk to me like that!

Emily

You and Dad speak to each other? All you guys do is fight!

Diane

We do not fight! We are just VERY LOUD!

Emily

[to Tobias] And you! How could you do this to me?!

Honey, no one is doing anything to you. Your mother and I are just... wait a second. How do you know about... your mother and me?

Emily

I know everything. I put a keystroke logger on both your Facebook accounts.

Diane

You what?!

You need a warrant to do that!

Abby

Gibbs, Gibbs, Gibbs, Gibbs! I cracked the suspect's cellphone. There are boatloads of juicy texts on there from him to Fornell's ex-wife.

Abby

I mean, this stuff is kinkier than Fifty Shades of Gray. You have got to come see this...

Abby

Fornell... ex-wife... daughter. [laughs weakly] Oops.

Diane

[chasing after him] You get back here or I will smash every computer in that lab!

Abby

[chasing after her] Don't you touch my babies!

Emily

[to Gibbs] Can I apply for asylum?