[Mike is lagging behind, so Servo and Crow enter the theater alone. Title card is shown.]
I don't know, you had him last! [laughs]
You can't say that! You're gonna get in trouble! That's a really stupid joke, and I'm gonna tell Mike!
Ha-ha, I don't care, what's Mike gonna do, anyway? [laughs]
[Mike enters.]
Mike, the title came up and it said Werewolf, and then Servo said "I don't know, you had him last!" And...and I...I think that was a really stupid joke...
[chuckles] Ah, well, that's pretty funny, I like that!
[backpedaling] Heeeey, that's what I meant! I...I like it.
[Mike finishes chuckling]
[sighs, defeated] Good one, Servo.
[gloating] Well, thank you! [chuckles]
[Yuri breaks into a massive brawl with the other archaeologists.]
Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Archaeologists!
. . .
It's a production of Road House in the Park.
. . .
And during the fight, they stomped all over the Ark of the Covenant.
[Shot of a poor-looking werewolf running through the woods.]
No, wait! It's a gorilla!
[Close up of poor-looking werewolf mask.]
[At a party, writer Paul chats with archaeologist Natalie.]
I'm actually working on something now.
Really? What's the subject matter?
CACrow [as Paul]
You're right. The subject doesn't matter at all!
[In the lab, a grandmother-like Noel (Richard Lynch) stalls English-impaired Natalie.]
What are you hiding from me, Noel? Tell me the truth!
SAServo [as Noel]
[in Grandma voice] You can't handle the truth, deary!
In due time, you'll know everything.
Well, maybe then it's too late!
Wow! The future conditional pluperfect subjunctive.
[At the harpsichord pool bar, Natalie confronts Yuri about his werewolf-kidnapping plan.]
SAServo [as Natalie]
The... thing that it comes to?
You and Noel is in it for fame and fortune?
CACrow [as Yuri]
Yes, we is.
But over my deadBODy. You hear me? I won't stand for it!
SAServo [as Natalie]
You is a jerk!
[Paul, having completely transformed into a werewolf, approaches Sam.]
CACrow [as Paul]
No, I'm a squirrel monkey; OF COURSE I'm a werewolf, you...
[Near the end of the film, a door slams in the background]
Oh, that was the sound of the director giving up and leaving.
[Mike, Crow and Servo sing alternate lyrics over generic Native American chanting in the credits]
Pow Wow the Indian boy, loved all the animals in the west...
MCMike, Crow and Servo
We will, we will, we will ROCK YOU! Tusk!
Though they ran through the briars and they ran through the brambles and they ran through the places where a rabbit wouldn't go...
Gypsies, tramps and thieves, we heard it from the people of the town...
MCMike, Crow and Servo
Tusk!
High on a hill lived a lonely goatherd, lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo...
Here comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus, right down Santa Claus Lane...
MCMike, Crow and Servo
Tusk!
Give it away, give it away, give it away now! Give it away, give it away, give it away now!
I've got a brand new pair of roller skates, you've got a brand new key...
MCMike, Crow and Servo
Tusk!
Admiral Halsey notified me, he had to have a bath or he couldn't get to sleep...
And the cat's in the cradle with the silver spoon, Little Boy Blue with the man in the moon...
In your Easter bonnet, with all the frills upon it...
One night in Bangkok makes a strong man crumble!
Chicks and ducks and geese better scurry, when I take you out in a surrey...
MCMike, Crow and Servo
Oh Susanna, oh don't you cry for me! Cause I come from Alabammy with a banjo on my knee! Tusk!
