A character in My Boys
We're celebrating, Bobby got his old job back!
Yup, pay cut and everything.
Yeah, and I'm helping him celebrate while traffic clears.
It's nine o'clock, I think traffic's clear.
It worked! Let's celebrate!
[Stephanie announces that Brendan has been named one of Chicago's sexiest bachelors and there will be a party to celebrate.]
Sweet! Oh we are totally going. Oh, there will be a ton of women there hoping to glom on to one of the sexy bachelors.
But we're not one of 'em.
Nope, but we know one. So we hover around Brando all night and when the moment's right, bang!
Bang!
We swoop in to snag his drunken castoffs.
[falsetto] Daddy, how did you meet Mommy? [deep voice] Well dear, Mommy was a drunken castoff.
Yeah, see, she wanted to go home with Uncle Brando that night, but Daddy was in the right place at the right time.
Daddy, do you think I can be a drunken castoff someday?
Dare to dream, sweetie. Goodnight.
Dude, I cannot date him, okay, he is a Cub, alright! That is breaking like a ton of unwritten journalism rules.
Unwritten rules were meant to be... written.
Then broken.
Written then broken. Thanks Kenny, I got a little lost there.
I guess I thought debt counselling would be more like Driver's Ed. You know? Where you ignore the film strips that they show and sleep through a couple of lectures and be on your way.
That just cleared up so much about your driving.
It was so weird, all she wanted to do today was "spa" and "club".
I like your verbs that are things. I think I'm gonna sandwich after I sofa here for a bit.
[Mike reads his letter]
"Brendan. You screened my call, douchebag. You're a really big douche. If you were a superhero you'd be Captain Douchebag. Your superpowers would be screening calls and the ability to wreck any hang. Douche." And then I drew a picture of you as Captain Douchebag.
Who is he fighting?
That's a giant lizard.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's My Boys pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
My Boys · 60 quotes
