[Stephanie announces that Brendan has been named one of Chicago's sexiest bachelors and there will be a party to celebrate.]
Sweet! Oh we are totally going. Oh, there will be a ton of women there hoping to glom on to one of the sexy bachelors.
But we're not one of 'em.
Nope, but we know one. So we hover around Brando all night and when the moment's right, bang!
We swoop in to snag his drunken castoffs.
[falsetto] Daddy, how did you meet Mommy? [deep voice] Well dear, Mommy was a drunken castoff.
Yeah, see, she wanted to go home with Uncle Brando that night, but Daddy was in the right place at the right time.
Daddy, do you think I can be a drunken castoff someday?
Dare to dream, sweetie. Goodnight.
T Trouty
Hey, Sportin' Life, what number sexy are you?
Uh, I'm not on the list, Trouty.
T Trouty
What? Interrobang? What happened? Do you photograph puffy? Were you having a bad hair day? Although, you do kind of actively pursue that. I'm phmished. Ampersand flummoxed.
Actually, Brendan is on the list, so.
T Trouty
What number sexy are you?
T Trouty
[winces] Slam! No man, that's cool. I mean, the important thing is that you're all up in there swinging.
Dude, I cannot date him, okay, he is a Cub, alright! That is breaking like a ton of unwritten journalism rules.
Unwritten rules were meant to be... written.
Written then broken. Thanks Kenny, I got a little lost there.
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