Katy. How're you now?
Good and you?
Not so bad.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
Nice onesie. Does it come in men's?
Oh, I think you cum in men enough for all of us.
I think you better come in my...I mean, you better come...
I think you better come say that to his face, you fucking hicks!
Nice execution.
You're doin' terrific.
You looking for a tilly, buddy? Let's have a donnybrook!
Pump the brakes. You take your shirt off but leave your sunglasses on?
What sort of backwards fucking pageantry is that?
You gonna fight with those shades or play pokerstars.com?
Hold my spitter.
Dude, I can't hold your spitter, you're holding my spitter- just put the spitter down.
Tick tock.
[Jonesy takes off his shirt and puts his hat on backwards]
Go time!
Go time!
Look at that fucking treasure trail.
What's up with your fucking body hair, big shoots? You look like a 12 year-old Dutch girl. Your aesthetician coiff that for ya?
You can kiss my aesthetician. You guys do Cross-Fit?
You can Cross-fuck off.
Cross-fart. How many times you pulled your horn today, bud?
What?
Aw, she's bashful.
Well, come on kitten, I won't tell anyone. Ballpark, six to eight? You're a fucking animal.
Play a little five-on-one?
Hit the kitchen, mix a batch.
Feed the ducks.
Distribute some free literature.
It's a hard life picking stones and pulling teats, but sure as God's got sandals, it beats fighting dudes with treasure trails.
KKatie
Look, keep it at the end of the laneway, no degens on the property.
That's a Texas-sized 10-4.
KKatie
Over and out.
Daryl': Think we should call The Ginger?
No.
Why not? He's tougher than hell.
Yeah, but.....like, you heard he fucked an ostrich, right?
....What?
He fucked an ostrich
Allegedly.
How does a fella get caught up in that sort of business?
Well, I guess his cousin had an ostrich farm, when he thought it might be fun to fuck one.
Allegedly!
You appreciates my metaphors Miss Katy and that's what I appreciates about you.
Oh, is that what you appreciate about me?
Let's take about five to ten percent off that, Squirrelly Dan.
You better settle down over there or I'm going to come talk to you.
You know what, there's two things about you that I don't like - and it's your face!
There's one thing about your own face you're not going to like, and that's when I come give it the beats!
GGail
(in the context of a conversation about Boots) You guys ever hear anything about that guy fucking an ostrich?
No, it was The Ginger that fucked an ostrich.
Allegedly.
GGail
It would take more than one person to fuck an ostrich.
We've heard it was a sick ostrich.
GGail
Well, it would take two guys to fuck an ostrich. Three, even.
Again, we're hearing it was a sick ostrich.
GGail
Still, it's a three-man job to fuck one.
Agricultural Halls are for agricultural music, not for fuckin' raves!
Well, that's no way to get your communication badge, Boy Scout.
SStewart
Yes, there will be MDMA at my rave at the Ag Hall. There will be MDMA, DMT, PCP, LSD, LED and probably UFC. But+ I'm clean and sober.
You are spare parts, aren't you, bud?
TTanis
If they fucked an ostrich, what else have they fucked?
Just the Ginger fucked an ostrich.
Allegedly.
I can see the muscle shirt came today. Muscles coming tomorrow?
You get a tracking number?
Boy, I hope you got a tracking number.
That package is going to be smaller than the one you're currently sporting.
Tall order, Dary.
[At the Agricultural Hall, McMurray motions to move excess coat hangers from the rear hall to the front hall].
'kay.
Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, look at me, Wayne, Wayne. There is a tried, tested, and true system at work here, and as President of the Agricultural Hall, I must demand it be respected. One member makes a motion. Then another member seconds that motion.
Second, 'kay.
"Kay" is not a second.
Well, it's the second time I said, 'kay.
So you second my motion?
You wanna know what, I'm all out of seconds, bud.
So it's not a second.
Well, this is taking too many seconds is what I'm saying.
Well, you only have to second once.
All right, give me a second.
So are you saying that you second or you need a second?
Well, one second.
All right, Wayne you shall be given one second.
(everyone pauses while Wayne looks away)
While Wayne is taking a second....
I second the fucking motion, McMurray, now move the fucking coat hangers!
SStewart
I hear McMurray has commissioned Devon, et al to make a video for his campaign. I suggest you follow suit.
What sort of video?
SStewart
A spectacle! Pure adrenaline! Babylonian!
You're spare parts, bud.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Letterkenny pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.