Harm quotes from JAG

(talking about Mic) Do you love him?

Do you love Renee?

I'm not marrying Renee

We should, we should go back in.

Hey, do you love him?

That's not a question you get to ask.

Why did you go to him so quickly?

You pushed me away. What was I supposed to do?

Wait.

For how long?

As long as it takes.

I want you to be happy for me.

I am happy for you.

Really? I'd hate to see you when you disapprove.

I don't disapprove, Mac. I'm just raising questions.

When did you become my caretaker?

You know, you save a person's life that makes you responsible for them.

I was just writing the funeral oration for Lieutenant Li.

Well, I would consider it an honour if you would read it to us, general.

‘Like an eagle he soared above the clouds, as light as a feather in the breeze, until his life was snuffed out like a candle in the wind.’ I think I will amend that last.

A little too much Elton John, huh, general?

Precisely.

Lieutenant Roberts, you know both the lieutenant colonel and myself. Which of us do you like better?

I’ll take this one, Commander. Lieutenant, do you have any particular relationship with one or the other of these people?

Bud

Well, the Commander is the godfather to my son, sir. But on the other hand, the colonel is his godmother.

That’s even handed of you, lieutenant. But is there anything that would prejudice you against Commander Rabb or Colonel MacKenzie?

Bud

Commander Rabb did try to put my father in jail. But that is his job. And Colonel MacKenzie took me off a case where I was co-counsel. But I kind of deserved that. Also...

Lieutenant. Given your relationship with both attorneys, can you be objective?

Bud

Absolutely, sir.

['Flying a F-14 Tomcat above the Superbowl dome.] Well, it's no 50-yard line, but it's still a hell of a view. And we have the play-by-play on CBS Radio. Could have pulled worse duty than flying cover, eh, Skates? ince we're up here, what do you say we take a picture for the folks back home?

Just point and shoot.

[After Harm inverts and reverts the F-14 Tomcat.] Whoo! All right!

Since when did my office become a production of Hello Dolly.

(To Sturgis.) It’s about a matchmaker.

Sturgis

You think I live under a rock?

I need to ask you both a question. If you murder co-counsel in the courtroom, can you cop an insanity plea?

Harriet

Absolutely.

Yes.

Thought so.

Are you okay?

Yeah. Fine. You?

Yeah…thanks, Mac. That took guts.

You would have done the same for me.

Yeah, well the navy doesn't teach us tricks like that.

Neither does the Marine Corps. I saw it in a movie.

You saw it in a movie?

Yup. (She walks off.)

They don’t use real booby traps in movies.

Come on.

They make things up! Mac!

You know, if you want, I could call down to the front desk and ask them to send up a room divider.

I thought you’d want your own space.

How much more space do I need, Mac?

Well, fine. (She shuffles a little closer.)

You know, Mac, the temperature is gonna continue to drop, so if we don’t share body heat, we’re risking hypothermia.

You make it sound so inviting.

You want an invitation?

Yes.

Why don’t you come over here? It’s a little bit better than sleeping with scorpions.

All right.

Harm? You ever thought about how you want to go?

No. Look, this thing is fixed. Let’s pack up and get out of here, huh?

I want to die like Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.

Oh yeah? Well, which one am I gonna be then?

Butch, of course.

Well, that’s true he was the brains of the operation.

Yeah, but Sundance was the shooter that everyone was afraid of. That’s how I want to go in a blaze of glory against impossible odds.

Who is it?

Harm.

Uh, just a second. (Quickly starts to get dressed.)

Come on, Mac, what are you doing? Open up.

Uh, packing.

Well open up, let me help.

I’m also dressing.

I could help with that, too.

When’s the last time you ate, Coates?

I’m fine, sir.

Why don’t you go down to the mess hall and grab something to eat?

Sir, really, I’m not hungry.

It’s not a suggestion, Petty Officer. It’s an order.

Are you not hearing me?

Yes, sir. With all due respect sir, I’m wondering why you can disobey an order over your concern for Lt. Roberts and I can’t, sir?

Why don’t we uh, eat in shifts, Coates? You go first and then you can relieve one of us. I’ll come for you if we hear anything.

Sounds like a plan ma’am.

You know what ticks me off?

That she’s right?

That she ignored me and listened to you.

Marines have a command presence.

Just once I'd like for you not to have a comeback.

I don't have one for Bud dying.

You're not gonna need one.

Turner

I bet they toasted you in all three wardrooms after that stunt you pulled on Friday.

You were on a sub. How'd you know Harm flew that mission?

Turner

I heard a naval aviator got a cruise missile up his six and had to fly halfway to India to run it out of fuel. Only Superman, here, would be fool enough to pull a stunt like that.

Yeah well, I bet Alec Baldwin would have nailed that sub before it launched a missile.

Turner

Hey Harm--- we tried. That sub got a missile off just as we— Who told you about Alec Baldwin?

Lieutenant Singer told everyone at JAG you convinced the action group that you were Alec Baldwin.

Well, actually she said it was Sean Connery but Harriet knew who she meant.

Yeah. Harriet e-mailed Bud, that's how we found out about it. But I'm sure with Singer's mouth, half of DC knows by now that you think you're Alec Baldwin.

Or Sean Connery.

Turner

I will strangle that Lieutenant when we get back.

Oh, I know that look. That’s not a good look. I’ve seen that look before.

Is it that obvious?

Never play strip poker.