“Critical Condition” quotes from JAG

Who is it?

Harm.

Uh, just a second. (Quickly starts to get dressed.)

Come on, Mac, what are you doing? Open up.

Uh, packing.

Well open up, let me help.

I’m also dressing.

I could help with that, too.

Petty officer, you can't go with them!

WATCH ME!

When’s the last time you ate, Coates?

I’m fine, sir.

Why don’t you go down to the mess hall and grab something to eat?

Sir, really, I’m not hungry.

It’s not a suggestion, Petty Officer. It’s an order.

Are you not hearing me?

Yes, sir. With all due respect sir, I’m wondering why you can disobey an order over your concern for Lt. Roberts and I can’t, sir?

Why don’t we uh, eat in shifts, Coates? You go first and then you can relieve one of us. I’ll come for you if we hear anything.

Sounds like a plan ma’am.

You know what ticks me off?

That she’s right?

That she ignored me and listened to you.

Marines have a command presence.

Just once I'd like for you not to have a comeback.

I don't have one for Bud dying.

You're not gonna need one.

Turner

I bet they toasted you in all three wardrooms after that stunt you pulled on Friday.

You were on a sub. How'd you know Harm flew that mission?

Turner

I heard a naval aviator got a cruise missile up his six and had to fly halfway to India to run it out of fuel. Only Superman, here, would be fool enough to pull a stunt like that.

Yeah well, I bet Alec Baldwin would have nailed that sub before it launched a missile.

Turner

Hey Harm--- we tried. That sub got a missile off just as we— Who told you about Alec Baldwin?

Lieutenant Singer told everyone at JAG you convinced the action group that you were Alec Baldwin.

Well, actually she said it was Sean Connery but Harriet knew who she meant.

Yeah. Harriet e-mailed Bud, that's how we found out about it. But I'm sure with Singer's mouth, half of DC knows by now that you think you're Alec Baldwin.

Or Sean Connery.

Turner

I will strangle that Lieutenant when we get back.