Jackie Chan Adventures quotes

The Chosen One is a cleanser of souls, not a washer of dishes.

[sigh] But I do not want to be the Chosen One.

Tch. Why not? You have your own personal champion, and servants who wade on you, hand and foot.

I am not accustomed to such treatment, Jade. I enjoy serving people, especially those I like.

Well, maybe washing dishes isn't the only way to help. Did you see how happy you made those villagers? The Chosen One serves too, in a different kind of way.

Perhaps you are right.

[grabs plate] Good, 'cause you missed a spot. You are so fired!

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Daolon Wong

Step aside, wizard! Your tepid spells cannot stop me!

Be warned! I was a student of Chi Master Fong!

Daolon Wong

And I am Daolon Wong, the Dark Master who defeated Fong!

[gasp] You will PAY for that!

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I'm sorry, but this find belongs to the museum.

HHaggis

Uh...your name is "The Museum"?

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Jackie! [leaps on him]

Hello.

[gasp; takes Greenbeard's Gloves] Are these from Greenbeard's ship? Can I keep 'em, please? I've been reading all about Greenbeard!

You've been reading? For pleasure?

Tch. Not like there's anything else to do around here! [picks up nearby book] "The meanest pirate of them all! Greenbeard swore he would keep stealing forever, even after he died. Argh!" How cool was he?

There is nothing "cool" about stealing, Jade.

Aw...

Crime does not pay. If Captain Black had not pulled strings after I left the Dark Hand, I would be in prison right now.

Instead, he lives under the supervision of his parole officer! [reveals Mahjong hand] So Tohru is free to lose as many games of Mahjong as he likes!

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So, do you think- could you please pull a few more strings?

Captain Black

I want to Jackie, but my hands are tied this time.

I really thought Tohru had left his past behind.

Captain Black

So did I, but the sad truth is some people never change.

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[Finn is dreaming of the Dark Hand performing with a rock band in front of an audience; mid-way through their song, Jackie leaps from a helicopter and grabs Finn by his collar]

But... we're not even doing anything wrong!

You are off-key. [punches Finn]

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CCustomer

[inspecting a vase] Is this late Yuan Dynasty or early Ming?

Uh... It is from China. [Customer leaves the shop]

[scoffs] You are a terrible salesman! You must know the merchandise.

Uncle's right, Tohru. For example, this lovely lamp is from the junk dyansty.

You are not helping, Jade.

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[in sales training, holding a painted duck]

Uh... Note the hand painted details and um... [clears throat] Duck shape?

How nice. I will take two.

Aiya! Tohru, you must mention its age. And Jackie, I did not believe your performance for a second.

Oh Uncle! Somebody made a sale.

Jade!

But wait! I also made an acquisition. [holds the Emerald of Killarney]

AIYA!

[This last exclamation echoes repeatedly into the world]

Infamous Emerald of Killarney. Feared throughout the world.

Feared?

That stone carries an Irish curse bringing endless bad luck to whomever possesses it. Jade, you are cursed!

Really? I don't feel cur- [wind suddenly blows money from her hand into a candle flame] I'M CURSED!

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I got you into this, at least let me help get you out! Besides, you can't go to Ireland by yourself. You're cursed.

I can handle a little bad luck Jade.

Not without Uncle's lucky charms. [gives him a Garlic necklace] Garlic, good for digestion, and for luck. One more thing. [hands him a live rabbit] Rabbit's feet. They work better when they are still on the rabbit. [gives him a handful of radishes] And keep these with you at all times, or else...

Or else what?

The rabbit will get hungry!

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BUBeat-up Man

[beckons to Uncle's Shop] That's where I unloaded the Emerald.

RRatso

Chan?!

CChow

He has the stone?!

Of all the rotten luck!

RRatso

Maybe we should track down a different emerald.

Yo, I'm the boss, and I say we're getting this emerald! Hey, maybe Chan was too much for the Dark Hand, but we are the Finn Experience!

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Jade?

Uncle may go for garlic and rabbits, but we both know I'm your real good luck charm.

Jade, you are going back right- [suddenly pinched] Ow!

MMan

Top of the morning to ya.

You're going back- [pinched again] Ow! You're- [pinched again] Ow! Why does everyone keep doing that?!

'Cause this is Ireland, you're not wearing green, and it's kinda St. Patrick's Day.

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[cellphone rings] Hello?

Jackie, I have been doing more research. Tohru is performing an Irish Good Luck spell for you. Is it working?

Don't- [pinched] Ow! -think so.

You call that an Irish Jig, Tohru? That spell says you must River Dance! [to Jackie] One more thing. To avoid bad luck, always wear a belt, beware of men named Seamus, and never stand with your back to an open door.

Are you making these up?

Do you want Uncle's help or not?!

[backs away from an open door] Bah! Open door! [backs into Finn, Ratso, and Chow] Ah! The Dark Hand?!

Not anymore. We are Finn and the Revolution!

RRatso

I thought we were the Finn Experience.