Liv Moore quotes from IZombie

Liv Moore

[Liv hints towards sex] So, those nights you didn't come home...

I'm loud. Seriously, I sound like a cartoon character being murdered. I wouldn't want to put you through it. And what about you? It's like a convent up in here.

Liv Moore

Do you know what I keep asking myself?

Major Lilywhite

Why? Why didn't the Seahawks just give the ball to Marshawn?

Liv Moore

How stupid we must be?

Liv Moore

I'm going to remind you something, son. Something you already know. The world ain't all Dilly Bars and debutante balls. The world throws wicked punches. It wants to see who goes down easy. Some people stay down on the mat. Not you, though. You were an undersized walk-on free safety at U-Dub. Three years later you were a starter. It takes a tough, get-back-off-the-mat son-of-a-bitch to do that. But that ain't what impressed me. I fell in love with the guy who could've cashed in on his looks, his connections, his notoriety. But instead, he said, I've been blessed, and I want to give back. I'm going to be a social worker. 'I'm going to be the guy who gets others back up.' I know you've taken some haymakers lately. I know that this time it's harder to get back up than it's ever been. But you're Major mother-flippen Lilywhite, and you don't quit.

Major Lilywhite

[Major says with a smile] God, you're so weird.

Liv Moore

Whatever happened to Magic Mike, that super-hot guy you hired?

Let's just say he's done some quality work underneath me.

Liv Moore

As the ranking zombie on-site, shouldn't I get veto-power over their names? I'm kind of over your whole Star Wars theme. Why don't we name these guys after the '86 Celtics?

Ravi Chakrabarti

As in Celtic F.C., from Glasgow?

Liv Moore

As in Boston Celtics. Bird, Mchale, Parrish.

Ravi Chakrabarti

Then, no. I don't have the foggiest idea who those guys are. And neither will you in a few days. We'll just be standing here trying to remember why we're calling a rat Bird. [Ravi talks down to one of the rats, Ravi then smacks his lips] Isn't that right, Boba Ratt?

Liv Moore

So, what? He turned off the cameras so his killer couldn't be identified? Think how easy it would be if there was video footage.

Ravi Chakrabarti

And the killer could have been wearing a t-shirt that inexplicably had his name and addresses written across his chest.

Liv Moore

And the address was, like, right across from the police station.

Ravi Chakrabarti

And the killer's just waiting calmly, already handcuffed, just sort of reciting his Miranda rights to himself.

Liv Moore

That would be so great. Now what are we going to do?

Clive Babineaux

[hesitates] I guess we earn our paychecks.

We have a guy who works at our firm, a fixer. He cleans up messes like this. He told me to wipe down the bat and everything else with bleach.

Liv Moore

But you forgot the blinds.

I was working fast.

Liv Moore

'Be quick, but don't hurry' John Wooden said that.

Clive Babineaux

Let me tell you what it looks like, Harry. You have a gambling problem. Racked up debts you couldn't pay. Telly was sent to break some bones, or worse, but Telly brought a hammer to a bat fight.

Liv Moore

[Liv whispers in Clive's ear] Nice touch, Clive. You got this.

Major Lilywhite

Liv, I don't want to do this anymore.

Liv Moore

Do what?

Major Lilywhite

Pretend I'm okay just being your friend. I want more. I want us to be together again.

Liv Moore

Major, nothing has changed. I still...

Major Lilywhite

I know all the risks, and the reasons it can't work. But I don't care. I'm a better man with you in my life. Can we give it another shot?

Liv Moore

We've been pulling bullets out of Mr. Cole all day. We heard you were inches away.

Clive Babineaux

Yards away. Nothing heroic about not getting shot.

Ravi Chakrabarti

Well, did you soil yourself?

Clive Babineaux

No.

Ravi Chakrabarti

[Ravi smiles] Then it's heroic in my book.

Peyton Charles

(as Liv and Major kiss) Wait, wait, wait, is this happening?

Liv Moore

It's happening.

Peyton Charles

About damn time.

Ravi Chakrabarti

But it won't always be this nauseating, right?

Major Lilywhite

Suffer, bitch.

Liv Moore

I've got that lucky feeling tonight, Doc. Give me some good news on the safe sex research.

Ravi Chakrabarti

Oh, nothing certain yet, though I have proven that when you purchase boxes of every brand of condom available at once, the lady at the drugstore counter looks at you funny.

Ravi Chakrabarti

[as Liv hums] Did you and Major have sex?

Liv Moore

Whoa. Aren't Brits supposed to be repressed? What would Judi Dench say?

Ravi Chakrabarti

She'd say we don't know a lot about the sexual transmission of zombie-ism.

Blaine DeBeers

Are you ever happy you're a zombie?

Liv Moore

You should know that's a stupid question.

Blaine DeBeers

Is it? Before I became a zombie, I was wasting my life. Human Blaine was a nobody. An underachiever. He was a, he was a joke. Zombie Blaine, though... Zombie Blaine was the man.

Liv Moore

He was a murderer.

Blaine DeBeers

But he was exceptional.

Liv Moore

I saw a movie once set in a jungle prison. Prisoners wrote messages on the bottom of turtles' shells.

Clive Babineaux

[Clive puts on a pair of gloves, picking up the turtle] Ah... The things they never tell you that you'll be doing at the detective academy.

Dale Bozzio

[as Dale Bozzio walks into the room] Babineaux! You and that turtle get a room.

Clive Babineaux

I'm looking for messages.

Dale Bozzio

[Bozzio nods] I won't ask.