Stacey Boss quotes from IZombie

Stacey Boss

I'm a CPA, not a super villain!

Stacey Boss

You ever play Dungeons & Dragons, Blaine?

Stacey Boss

I remember my first. It went so smooth, like filling out a 1040A. Afterwards, I treated myself to a steak. Double cut. Medium rare. It's a nice tradition.

Stacey Boss

I did. I was a hell of a Dungeon Master. If players screwed up, they did something dumb, they paid the price. But... as they were bleeding out on the battlefield, there was always a Hail Mary. The God call. That 1% chance the God that they worshipped would come down from the heavens, smite their enemies and save them. I suggest you make your God call.

Stacey Boss

There's your second-place prize. Well, God? [Mr. Boss waits to see if Blaine has a God call come down and save him, when nothing happens] I think we're good.

Stacey Boss

Here it is, boys. The Great Northern Railway's premiere passenger train, the Empire Builder. When this baby's whistle blows, I might, too.

Stacey Boss

I want Blaine dead. Dead, dead. And when it's done, cut his head off, bring it to me in a hat box. This is Seattle, not Sleepy Hollow.

Stacey Boss

What exactly is a 'vigilante crime fighter'?

Liv Moore

You know exactly what he is, a superhero. A selfless defender of those who can't defend themselves.

Stacey Boss

I see. I don't want to pretend to know how to do your job, but it just seems to me, your best bet, would be to aim a floodlight into the night sky with his logo burned into it. I'm sure he'd find you.

Stacey Boss

Can I offer you a Vatrushka? Come on. You've got a second shot at life. Indulge.

Liv Moore

I'm good.

Stacey Boss

Well, there's your problem.

Blaine DeBeers

I saw things at that boat party. Things that still haunt me. I spent a couple weeks shivering in a dark room, and I decided it was a sign that I needed a change.

Stacey Boss

A sign, huh? You think God was so desperate for you to change your ways that he slaughtered all those innocent people to make a point?

Blaine DeBeers

Well, we're talking about the same guy that thought Noah's Ark was a solid plan

Stacey Boss

I'm not disputing that Bonnie and Clyde are like family to you, but the IRS doesn't allow you to claim pit bulls as dependents.

But I'm their sole provider.

Stacey Boss

I know, but I always advise my clients to stay on the right side of the law.

[about Blaine] Remember his nickname?

Stacey Boss

No.

Chinatown. 'Cause you gave him a corner right in the middle. Of the blue cobras' territory, told him it was his if he could hold it.

Stacey Boss

In Chinatown. Got it. Great story.

No. That's not how he got his name. He got it from the way he took the corner. He recruited these two 'roided-up Asian dudes from the gym. And put blue cobra tattoos on 'em. Had 'em grab the beat cop that worked that corner. They sliced open his nostril like Nicholson's. In Chinatown.

Blaine DeBeers

I hear you're a procol harum fan.

Stacey Boss

I never cared for that psychedelic pseudo-mystical stuff. More of a British invasion guy.

Blaine DeBeers

Let's go back to my place, man. I'll play you anything you want. Beatles. Stones. Kinks.

Stacey Boss

Your playing days are over, I'm afraid. Lucky u. Sometimes, pointing out the irony almost feels cheap.

Stacey Boss

Here we are. Any last words?

Blaine DeBeers

[Blaine smiles] I gave you a run for your money, didn't I?

Stacey Boss

So, these two have taken over Blaine's business? I want them dead. Extra bloody.

You sure? So soon...

Stacey Boss

I won, Kenny. Seattle threw in the towel. I own this city. So, let's take our victory lap.