Hill Street Blues quotes

Hunter

Linda, may I speak freely?

I wish you would.

Hunter

Since meeting you I've realized that there has been a part of my life that has been AWOL for longer than I care to admit. It's time I checked out of the POQ and went TDY. I long for the kitschy detail of little feet marching.

Are you reenlisting?

Hunter

I want to make an honest woman out of you. I want you to be my wife.

Oh-oh, my darling Howard! I love you so! [they begin passionately embracing and kissing]

Hunter

Then it's "yes"?

No.

Hunter

I was wondering if I could ask you a direct, personal question.

Goldblume

Sure, fire away.

Hunter

What is it like being a Hebrew?

Goldblume

What's it like being human, Howard?

Hunter

Well, it's no cakewalk.

Chief Daniels

We're not talking dog, Frank. We're talking image! And like it or not, this over-bred lapdog has a higher gubernatorial profile than the state bird, whatever the hell it is.

Goldblume

Uh, swallow, sir.

Furillo

Whatever happened to serious journalism?

Davenport

It died years ago, Furillo, at the hands of a blow dryer.

Eddie

[picks up video tape from Mick's desk] Oh my, Michael. "Gentlemen Prefer Leather"?

Belker

It's evidence, you Hairball.

Renko

I'm already integrated.

Hill

That's right...I'm your daddy!

Hunter

[after the dog urinates on him] Damn foreign breed! Give me a Shepherd any day!

Eddie

I have no place to go. I was wondering, uh, if I could stay with you.

Belker

Are you nuts? Absolutely not. [relents] Okay, but just this one time.

Eddie

Oh, thank you, Mick! I'll make you a breakfast fit for a king!

Belker

You make me breakfast, I'll ram it down your throat.

Eddie

You're such a treasure!

Grace

[to Phil] There's still frontiers of passion we need to penetrate!

Hunter

Tell me, Henry, what do Jews do at Christmas?

Goldblume

I don't know, Howard. Go to Miami?

Belker

You sure you don't want to go get some dinner?

Jews and Italians…you're going to eat your way through grief!

Furillo

[referring to being ill from the bad Chinese] If I die, promise me you'll sue?

Davenport

Count on it.

Renko

[referring to the line outside the men's room after everyone ate Gung Ho's Chinese] The Mayflower's on the high seas, and all of her crew's come down with scurvy!

Hunter

We are the dentists of society, Henry, fighting a losing battle of urban decay!

Coffey

You know how Houdini died? Getting punched when he wasn't ready!

Bates

Yeah, well you need to work on your disappearing act!