Joe Coffey quotes from Hill Street Blues

Coffey

[on Renko's moped] Renko, did you put your Harley in the dryer again?

Coffey

[wearing riot gear, facing a group of looters] Just because there's a power failure, doesn't mean the laws are canceled.

Coffey

Look, Mr. Smith, we've come to get your telephone. Can you just tell us where it is?

You'll never find it! I-I dropped it in a time warp… between 1771 and 44 A.D.

Washington

[holding up a bag of drugs] Oh, man, look at all this powdered sugar! What were you doing, my man, making a cake?

I get a phone call, don't I?

Bates

One ten-cent call. That's it.

Coffey

And no intergalactic area codes, okay?

Coffey

You know how Houdini died? Getting punched when he wasn't ready!

Bates

Yeah, well you need to work on your disappearing act!

I need fifty good women!

Coffey

Don't we all.

Bates

Did you get the results?

Coffey

Of what, the lie detector test?

Bates

No, your pap smear, Joe.