Eddie Jaskowiak quotes from Hell's Kitchen

Over in the blue kitchen...

Two risotto, one capellini, one special! Yes?!

Yes, chef!

LET'S GO!!

...the men are still backed up on appetizers and have now put the tableside chefs in neutral...

Let me go check on them (the chefs inside the blue kitchen), I'll be right back.

...and so Jared and Eddie, in an attempt to be useful, head to the kitchen to offer their assistance.

Guys, talk to me? What do you boys need? What do you boys need?

I'm finishing off this risotto. Eddie!

(to Eddie while pointing on Mark's pan) Risotto!

(interview) I heard everything going on I was like, "You know they need help. I am going back in there". (in the kitchen) [holds a pan of risottos to be sent to the pass] Coming around hot, coming 'round hot.

(calling Eddie) Hey, hey, you, come here, you. Put it (the pan Eddie is holding) down. Who cooked this?

I started it, chef, Eddie finished it for me.

(to Mark and Eddie) Come here you, taste that! It's bland, the rice is still undercooked, disgusting!

(interview) Mark is not getting any of his dishes right. He looks like deer in headlights when he's getting yelled at. Bro, like wake up! Hello, you're here!

(to Mark) Come here. (to Eddie) You, come here. Sit down [let to sit him on the chef's table] and eat your shit. (to Eddie) Yes, take a seat, you must be tired if you're gonna fucking... (calls Marino) Uh, Marino!

Yes, chef?

Glass of sauvignon blanc for Chef Mark and Steady Eddie.

Okay.

Hurry up, let's go.

Hello, guys. And if I were you, I would actually eat it fast.

(interview) I swallowed the risotto just like I swallowed my pride. I still don't know how the hell I got roped into that, to be honest with you.

While the red team waits, back in the Blue kitchen...

Fire now, Buzz Aldrin, two tuna, four wellington.

Yes, chef.

Chef Ramsay looks to Hassan on meat to pilot this VIP ticket.

Hassan, focus on your table!

Yes, chef. Put the wellingtons in for me, Kevin.

Heard. Wellingtons going in the oven. [holds a plate of perfectly cooked wellingtons to mistakenly send in the oven]

(to Kevin) Where is he going?! WHERE'S THAT IDIOT GOING?!

(called Kevin over) Hey, whoa, whoa! They're done. (captions on a screen)

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, bring those back, please. Get them over here! (interview) Kevin, they're already cooked, man. We're cooking the ones that aren't cooked. Back up before you get slapped up, bro.

Man! (gives Kevin a warning; throws a fork to a cleaning rack) (Points his finger to Kevin) Hey, you, I'll kick you to the fucking moon. (to Kevin) Come here.

(interview) Oh, damn! Not good.

He maybe an astronaut, but you're a space cadet. (to Kevin) Are you okay?

Yes, chef.

You sure?

Yes, chef.

FUCKING HELL!

The blue team is hoping Alan's new risotto hits the mark.

Thirty seconds on the riso(tto)s. Walking my risottos! [sending to the pass]

Is the fish and chips gone yet?

Fish and chips is one minute out, chef. (interview) We still have a shot in spite of everything that has fucked up so far.

Fish and chips?

Walking! [holds the fish on a pot and sending over to the pass] Right here to your right.

It's fucking raw fish. [returns the fish and chips to the workstation] ALL OF YOU, STOP! LOOK AT THIS FUCKING MESS! ITS JUST DISGUSTING!!! [Jared and Joe touch the fish] WE'VE HAD EVERY POSSIBLE FUCKING MISTAKE TONIGHT, AND IT'S NOW BEYOND A JOKE! [smashes the fish on a plate] RAW FISH!!! All of you, get the fuck out of here!

Yes, chef.

GET OUT! AND I MEAN NOW!

(interview) Argghhh... It was embarrassing tonight.

GET OUT!

Blue team, redemption! Two covers of table twenty-three, fire two chicken, CSI: Miami actor. (to Eddie) Hey, don't fuck this up.

Yes, chef.

You guys are really waiting for that chicken, huh? I'm waiting for that chicken.

(interview) I've worked in Michelin star restaurants, so, you know, the guys are looking at me as the go-to guy in the kitchen. I'm gonna help lead us to victory.

Slicing chicken.

[holds a pot and a pan] Garnish walking right now.

Ten hut, hut. Chicken in the pass. [in which it was found out raw and undercooked; Gordon returns the chicken onto a workstation]

All of you, come here? WHAT IS WRONG WITH THAT?!

A little undercooked, chef.

It's pink.

(interview) You fucking worked at a 3-star Michelin restaurant cook chicken right!

[let the team sit on a chef's table] All of you, take a seat. Fucking get in there! YEAH GET IN THERE! GET FUCKING IN THERE!

We'll have some more bread! Starch out!

There is no room for the chicken.

(interview) CSI stands for Crime Scene Investigator not your CHICKEN SUCKS, IDIOT!

So who wants to eat raw chicken?

(interview; imitates explosion) Aahh! My God!

Nobody, chef.

WHO WANTS TO EAT RAW CHICKEN?

Nobody, chef.

So why are you expecting them (points at Miller and crew) to do it? GET A GRIP!

Yes chef.