Brian Merel quotes from Hell's Kitchen

[walks to the pass with three pans] Five risotto coming up, chef!

Uh, stop there, Scott. It's–it's not even in one pan. That's what I'm saying. I got three different colours. I mean, honestly? [returns to workstation carrying the pans] All of you, come here!

Fuck!

Multi-coloured fucking risotto!! A light one, a dark one, and an in-between one. WHEN WE HAVE FIVE RISOTTO ON ONE TABLE, WHAT DO WE DO?! WHAT DO WE DO?!

On one pan.

Louder!

One pan, chef!

LOUDER!

ALL IN ONE PAN, CHEF!

[points at Clemenza] Tell him, then!

All in one pan!

Yes!

Tell him!

All in one pan!

Yes!

(to Brian) Tell him!

All in one pan, Clemenza!

Yes!

All in one pan!! (interview) One pan!

COME ON, THEN!

Yes, chef! I'll re-fire five right now!

Get it together! FOCUS ON A FUCKING RISOTTO!!

Yes, chef!

Three New York, two wellington, one bass. How long?

Three minutes, chef!

Drive the ticket! Let's go!

Yes, chef! (interview) It's still our first table, and all I want is the ticket to be done. I just want it to be done. But everything kept coming out wrong.

Come on, Brian. Here's the bass. Let me know when you're ready to go.

Walk with your bass. I'm slicing New York.

Yes. Go, go, go! Make sure it's cooked!

[slices steak in half] Raw. Ah, fuck.

No, no, no, no, no!

More time. It needs more time.

No! Get another one! (to Gordon) He's backed up! He's gonna be dragging steak at least two minutes!

Hold on! It's not ready! (to Justin) It's not ready.

It's still coming out WRONG! Are you serious?! (to Brian) MUPPET!! FUCKING HELL!! [sees several diners leave the dining room] Are you serious? They're walking out! Oh, my God. Urgently, where's the wellington?!

Okay, wellies walking. Wellies walking.

Oh, fuck me. Not another overcooked wellington. (sighs) Fucking hell. Honestly, I'm gonna go crazy. [returns to workstation] Overcooked wellingtons! It's like a joke now. [Brian pounds his fist] Honestly, guys, it's like a big fucking joke.

Come on! [Brian punches his forehead]

(to Brian) Hey, come here, fucking comedian! I have had enough. Come here, you! [leads Brian into the red kitchen] Barbie!

Yes, chef?

Come here, please! URGENTLY! You, on the meat!

Christina Wilson

Show him (Brian) how to do a wellie, Barbie.

He's not capable! Get over there!

Yes, chef, I got it.

Get him in, Barbie! Urgently!

(to Brian) Come on.

Fuck! (interview) Oh, I'm fucking furious. You gotta be kidding me. [carries wellington tray] GODDAMNIT!!

Oh, my God.

(interview) On a black jacket night, Barbie comes over to finish my fucking station?

Seven minutes. They're resting, chef.

[shouting through his teeth] GODDAMNIT!! (interview) I feel like a castrated dog.

You can't put all that meat on one fucking tray!

(interview) And I think Barbie is enjoying this, I really do.

[pounds fist again] DAMNIT!

Stay with it, Brian.

I can't do anything!

STAY WITH IT!

There's nothing I can fucking do! I've been demoted!

(to Robyn) Wellie garnish, how are you?

Walking with garnish, Barbie!

Walking with wellingtons.

Cooked perfectly! (to waiters) Service, please.

Nice job, Barbie.

Goddamnit! (interview) Oh, my God. [holds up left hand and pretends to hang himself]

The next app–Clemenza, pay attention to this. The next app is a truffle edamame ravioli. So, essentially it's ravioli, but it's done in wonton skins. [facepalms as Clemenza yawns] (interview) They've got to know that menu inside out, and I need Clemenza to stay focused. I need him to keep his head in the game. I need to know he has my back 100%. (to his teammates) Listen, I just wanna know—and I want a real answer—who the fuck is here really to be here and who really wants to get back in that kitchen and has something to prove. (to Clemenza) I'm going into it tomorrow with more pressure than you could ever imagine, and I want you to just get your head right where it needs to be.

Like, what the fuck? Who the fuck do you think you're talking to?!

I'm taking this 100% serious, man. This is the most important day of my life.

I get it. Here's my thing: I'm proud of what I did. I'm happy of my accomplishments, I don't get anything to prove to anybody.

Clemenza, shut the fuck up, PLEASE. (interview) Clemenza's a disaster right now. He's gotta pull his shit together. I need him to step up and get it done. (to Clemenza) I need you to be 100% FOCUSED.

Drill me as hard as you fucking want! It's all bullshit, it doesn't matter to me!

(interview) Clemenza is dead weight! Justin's gotta cut the fat where the fat needs to be cut!

(to Clemenza) Like, honestly to me, it's my fucking life right now! I need you to do it for me, but I want you to do it for yourself.

Dude, get off my fucking back. I don't care. I'm done! (interview) You wanna be the leader, you gonna be in command? You know what? You're gonna sink fucking quick. Stand back, 'cause I'll fucking roll over you like no tomorrow.

If you don't feel what I feel right now, that you wanna win, then you got a problem! You should just go the fuck home! [Brian throws his hands up]

(interview) I'm done. I'm done with this fucking kid.

CLEMENZA!

Motherfucker!

Shut that, SHUT THAT! SHUT IT! What is that? WHAT WAS THAT?

Fucking crostini.

(interview) AHH, CLEMENZA! CLEMENZA!!

This is not good.

(interview) Oh, my God. You just burned the fucking crostini!

Fuck me! (to Clemenza) You gotta get that on fire right away! Get that thing out of here in the garbage and get some more on the fire right away!

That was an amazing service, you know that. That was amazing. Really good job.

Christina Wilson

Thanks so much, guys. Seriously.

Really good job indeed. And on the back of that, I'm changing things: For the first time ever, I've decided to do away with the whole two-door thing, because I'm ready to decide a winner. The winner of Hell's Kitchen is... Tavon.

Christina Wilson

SHUT UP!

I KNEW IT!