Bryan quotes from Glee

Bryan

Can't feed a child sheet music, Will. I mean, I suppose you could for a while, but they'd be dead in a month.

Bryan

[About Will] Uh, I don't know this man. His caretaker just stepped away; I overheard him mention he's a sex offender.

Bryan

I've grown weary of your insults, Will. They're terrible, and they make me want to punch you in the face.

Bryan

We'll probably cut the glee club.

Will

What? But you were in the glee club. Show choir was your life!

Bryan

It was, Will. And after I graduated, I hit the big time. I was a featured soloist at King's Island in the Dooble-Dee-Doo Musical Revue; we were a smash. Then, for three years, I did the cruise ship circuit. When that dried up, I realized I had been sold a bill of goods. Nine years later, I woke up on a urine-stained mattress in the West Lima crack district. Then, something amazing happened: I was introduced to Jesus; he was my Honduran social worker. I straightened up, put down the pipe, met the love of my life, Wilma, and now I run a successful used Hummer dealership. Don't make that face – global warming's a theory.

Bryan

Sue, you're an impressive woman. I can't tell you how much you turn me on right now. You ever heard of the term, "anger sex"?

Sue

It's the only kind I know, Bryan.

Bryan

I should tell you I'm married.

Sue

Not a problem for me.

Bryan

And I'm still cutting half your budget.

Sue

Eh, you win some, you lose some.

Bryan

Should I lock the door?

Sue

No. Got a secret room upstairs – like Letterman.