Gilligan's Island · Season 1
I learned a little Hawaiian when I was singing in a club in Waikiki. Wahine wiki huki luki nu. And every word of it comes from the bottom of my heart.
Gee, that's real nice, Ginger. What does it mean?
"This bar is off limits to all military personnel."
You know, Skipper. I'm very happy to be here. I'm so happy, I could kiss the ground. [kisses the sand, then spits it out] This island tastes terrible.
I used to be a Girl Scout, and they teach you a lot!
I used to go with a Boy Scout, and they teach you a lot, too.
Oh, Shut up, will you Gilligan!
You can't tell Gilligan to shut up! I'll tell him when to shut up!
Thanks skipper. Now folks...
Shut up, Gilligan!
If we had to get marooned on an island, why didn't we pick Manhattan?
Think of it, ever since we got to this island, we've had nothing but bad luck. One disaster after another. What do you think caused it?
I thought we all agreed it was me.
Well, that glue is permanent! There's nothing on the island to dissolve it. Why do you know what it would take? It would take a polyester derivative of an organic hydroxide molecule.
Watch your language! You're in the presence of a lady!
[after the raft sinks in the lagoon, and the castaways make it back to shore] Hey Skipper? We sank anyway without the gold.
Oh, I'm afraid this is all my fault, folks. Why, I didn't think one bag of gold would sink us.
Two bags.
Three bags.
Four bags.
Five bags.
Six bags.
[after they all look at him, he scoffs] That's a switch. Usually I'm one left holding the bag.
[Gilligan & The Professor are digging a hole to bury the statue of Kona] There. That should be deep enough.
Make it a little deeper, Professor. I want to put him down so deep he'll get the bends.
Gilligan, that statue is not getting out of this hole.
Please make it a little deeper.
[the professor digs for a bit more, then puts the statue in the hole]
[the Skipper comes along and falls into the hole. He sees what's in the hole with him, jumps out and runs away]
Aaah! Kona!
Hey Skipper! Watch out for that... [sharp cracking sound] ...tree.
[a flash happens outside the hut] Fire! Fire!
[In comes Gilligan dressed as Watubi with Mary Ann and Ginger as his assistants]
Watubi! I didn't think you were gonna make it!
Neither did I. [Ginger and Mary Ann nudge him, goes into character] Watubi here to lift Curse of Kona!
[Smacks the Skipper on his stomach with his wand]
What did you think of my Mark Anthony?
Terrible! Terrible! Terrible!
Don't mind him, Skipper. He just says what he's taught.
And who's been teaching him?
I don't know.
Gilligan! Gilligan! Gilligan!
Blabberbeak!
I want Cary Grant for Christmas but I doubt Santa can fit that in my stocking.
If we had been doing these exercises all along, we'd be in good shape.
I don't see how you can exercise anyway in that dress. It's so tight. I'm surprised it doesn't cut off your circulation.
Honey, in Hollywood the tighter the dress, the more the girl circulates.
Sorry we're late, we were used to having our breakfast served in bed by a butler after he's had his breakfast served in bed.
Where's Mary Ann?
Baby, we don't need a cheering section.
I do, I'm an actress.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Gilligan's Island pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
