PDPorno-dealing Lizard
I videotape every customer that comes in here, so that I may blackmail them later.
Eew!
PDPorno-dealing Lizard
Hey, I'm a porno-dealing monster. What do I care what you think?
“Spanish Fry” · Season 4
In this episode: Lrrr (8), Philip J. Fry (6), Bender (6), Turanga Leela (3), Professor Hubert Farnsworth (2), Ndnd (2), Zoidberg (1), Planet Express crew (1)
RPRanger Park
Hey, I'm Ranger Park, the park ranger.
[cheerfully] I get it!
RPRanger Park
Now since this area's a national Bigfoot preserve, we'll start with a short film about Bigfoot while I make a few phone calls.
For the last time, I don't like lilacs! Your first wife was the one who liked lilacs.
She also liked to shut up.
We've been to every scuzzy bazaar in the galaxy, including Pottery Barn.
Don't tell me you believe in Bigfoot, you blithering ninny-hammer.
Of course I do. Bigfoot's my hero. Growing up, he was the celebrity I most identified with.
Why?
'Cause he was a loner who hated the popular monsters, yet longed to be one.
I can so relate to that.
[Zoidberg begins crying and hugs Leela. She breaks off from him]
Enough with the emotions. This isn't a fat camp.
One of these days, Ndnd - bang, zoom, straight to the third moon of Omicron Persei 8!
Fry, what in Sega Genesis happened?
Wait! Listen. I'm usually the first guy to toot my own lower horn--
I'll say! WOOOOO!
But in this case I-I just don't think it'll do any good.
That's what she said! WOOOOO!
Let's face it, you two have deep relationship problems that can't be solved by an aphrodisiac.
However huge it might be.
Mmm, this jerked chicken is good. I think I'll have Fry's lower horn jerked.
[from offscreen] It's used to it! WOOOOO!
So let me get this straight... if I buy eight Caramello bars, you all get to go to some camp.
Yep. That's exactly the lie we used to get past your guards.
[steps forward] Oh great space king, I humbly beg you to return my human horn.
Uh, human horn? How ridiculous! Why would a virile male like Lrrr need human horn? I don't even know what it's for. What is it, something you put in salad dressing?
Like you've ever seen a salad.
My weight is APPROPRIATE and ATTRACTIVE!
Yes! I never thought I'd escape with my doodle, but I pulled it out!
[from offscreen] Just like at the movie theater! WOOOOO!
[Ranger Park aims his gun at Bigfoot]
You're going to kill this innocent giganto?!
RPRanger Park
Of course not! I'm just gonna tranquilize him so I can chop off his feet as proof he exists, then dump him back in the wild. He'll do fine!
If I poach this beast's lower horn, am I any better than that ranger with his demented foot lust? Yes. But not by enough.
This human's lower horn is one of God's creatures, a living thing, and all living things, large and small--
[from offscreen] In this case, small! WOOOOO!
[Lrrr and Ndnd, having reconciled, start heavily making out, much to Fry, Leela and Bender's disgust]
Uh, you'll wanna retreat to a safe 500-metre radius!
[as they flee] Well, Fry, it looks like you get to hold onto your lower horn.
As usual! WOOOOO! RUN AWAAAAY!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Futurama pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.