Frida Suárez quotes from El Tigre: The Adventures of Manny Rivera

[sighs] What am I going to do with that boy?

Grandpapi

Don't worry, someday Manny will be a truly great villain.

Hero, he'll be a hero!

Frida

So, what now?

Oh, uh, maybe, uhh… Hide Sartana's loot and tell my dad it disappeared?

Frida

Dude, you are an artist.

Frida

[noticing Manny looking really upset] Dude, why so mopey? You're acting like they just outlawed churros. [gasps] They didn't, did they?

Manny

[ashamed] (No.) My dad is super mad at me. I totally been messing up with him lately.

Frida

Do tell. [grabs and pulls him by the collar; shouting in demand] I SAID TELL!

Manny

Okay, okay! Like, yesterday, me and Dad were doing a little crime-fighting.

You do not have a chance. Dr Chipotle Sr's son is sneaking up behind you.

That's where you're wrong. Because my son has taken care of him. Right, Manny? Manny?

[playing a video game] I'm on it, Dad! High Score!

[annoyed] Ah, I see. [gets blasted by Dr. Chipotle Jr.]

Manny

And later, me and Dad caught El Oso robbing a factory… An underpants factory.

[kicks the doors open] El Oso, drop those drawers! [Manny bursts out in a fit of hysterical laughter; confused] What? What's so funny? [El Oso rises behind him and uses a pair of pink thongs, giving him an atomic wedgie; screams in pain]

Manny

You try to keep a straight face in a room full of pink thongs.

Frida

Dude, preaching to the choir.

Manny

How am I gonna make it up to him?

Frida

You could clean your room. [Manny annoyingly looks at her] Sorry, talking crazy.

Black Cuervo

Aren't we going to fight, even a little? I got new lasers- they're strawberry.

[agitated] GO!

Black Cuervo

[annoyed] Fine! Now I have one more reason to hate you! [flies away]

Frida

And by "hate," she means "love."

She said I'm the best friend she's ever had!

Frida

Meanwhile, you're totally stabbing her in the back and stuff. [laughs] But…

Yeah?

Frida

That's nothing compared to how upset your dad's gonna be when he finds out what you've done.

[gulps nervously; guilty] You're right, Frida. I've gotta tell 'em both the truth.

Black Cuervo

[heartbroken and deceived after Manny confesses about using her as a pawn to date her into tipping off his father] How could you?! [starts attacking him with fury] I thought you liked me, but you were just… USING ME!

[whispering a little quicker] Cuervo, you're totally right. I'm sorry I treated you so lousy, but I'm going to make it up to you.

Black Cuervo

[scoffs] How?

This fight. I'm going to let you win.

Black Cuervo

[enraged in shock] LET ME WIN?!

Frida

Ooh, bad call.

Manny

I'll yank that puppy off you with a little… [changes into El Tigre] Tigre power!

Frida

Zombie not bad, Manny. Frida like zombie.

You may feel a pinch.

Papa, why is Frida so weird?

Emiliano

Your sister is not weird. She is… different… from us.

Frida

[heartbroken] Different? I'm different? [starts tearing up]

Manny

Come on, you've got plenty in common with your family.

Check out what's at the museum… The Golden Mustache of the Pharaohs. The Mustache Mafia are totally gonna… [notices Frida looking really sad and upset] Hey, what's wrong?

Frida

Nothing. It's just… lying to my dad like this…

Oh, you feeling a little guilty?

Frida

No, of course not. Guilty, me? [laughs] I laugh. Guilt slides off me like water off a duck's back. A filthy, stinking, no-good duck who lies to her dad!

Aw, man. We totally broke their dad!

Frida

No, you broke their dad, I wrecked the puppy hospital.

Stall. I work on the door.

It's weird. I kinda understand why my dad acts all... daddish.

Frida

Understand: yes. Like: no. [sees that they're flying towards back to Miracle City] Hey, look, the Miracle City volcano!

[wounded] Oh, good...

Mom, are you okay? [points to the glove] Get your hand off my mom!

Maria

Manny, it's not what you think.

Maria, you said the glove was destroyed in the jaws of the Robasura.

Maria

I thought it was. [Flashback to the events of "A Mother's Glove", when the glove lands in the Robasura and gets crushed by its jaws after its battle with Manny; voice-over] But a few days later, it showed up on my doorstep, hurt and scared. I just couldn't turn it away. As I nursed it back to health, I realized the glove was good inside. Tests in my home lab showed that if I wore the glove for only one hour at a time, I could control the danger mania. Even a few seconds more, and I become… unstable. So, the glove and I made a deal. [Flashback ends] I will use my Plata Peligrosa powers to help those in need, but when my watch alarm sounds, it must get off my hand. Right, "Glovey?"

That's great, Mom.

Frida

You have a home lab?

Maria

Now, I can help my boys out in a crisis.

[gazing dreamily at her] You called me handsome.

Maria

Rodolfo, don't listen to what I say when I'm wearing the glove. I'm not myself. [Rodolfo puckers up his lips to kiss her; puts her hand on his mouth] You and I always be just friends.

Of course. I understand completely. [Maria walks off] She called me handsome!

Frida

Wow, your mom and dad, a crime-fighting team. Maybe they'll get back together. [imitates kissing while rubbing Señor Chapi's head] Oh, Rodolfo, you're so handsome.

[touched while blushing] Ah, viva pantalones.

Manny

Cut it out, Frida. We both know my parents are better off apart.

Frida

Yeah, but does your dad know?

Manny

Sure he does. Probably. Down deep. Anyway, as long as he keeps his mind off beautifying the city.

Rodolfo

Maria, we have been seeing a lot of each other lately, and… No, that's not right. [clears throat] Mi vida, I, that is, um… I need to ask you, will you have coffee with me?

Frida

Manny, it's just coffee.

Manny

You know what happens after a man and woman have coffee?

Frida

[gasps] Danish?

Manny

No! They have a real date!

Manny

Dad! Oh, man. He's gonna get his heart broken. [determined] We gotta make him see that she's not herself when she's wearing that glove.

Frida

Right, 'cause that isn't obvious.

Manny

So we'll make it even more obvious. This I swear!

[giving Frida the alarm watch] (Here,) Hide this.

Frida

But without the alarm, your mom's gonna go all danger-crazy.

Exactly.

What's that noise?

Wind.

Frida

Elephants.

Airplane.

Frida

Thingy-thing.

[looks up and gasps] Maria! [Maria's eyes light up in flames and she suddenly goes completely insane with danger and beats up the monsters, violently; utterly shocked] I have never seen so much grotesque grotesquely. That's not like Maria. It's not love!

[grabs Rodolfo by the collar] You and I belong together, White Pantera! Come on. Spend your life with me, crushing evil, and laughing in danger, and never taking this glove off! [laughs wickedly insane]