Bernice quotes from Designing Women

Carlene

I just can't believe you! I thought you were up here nursing a broken heart... but here you are hokey-pokeying with some showgirl!

Anthony

(looking over at the sleeping girl) Who the hell is that?

Mary Jo

Oh c'mon, Anthony! It's your little friend from the Follies Bergere!

Anthony

But how the hell did she get in my bed?!

B.J.

Boy... if you can pull that one off you're my first choice for this year's Academy Award.

Anthony

Look... I'm not kidding!! I don't have any idea how she got here! Oooh... my head.....

Bernice

You know, this girl is really a snoozer. I think that we should get her up and slap her around and make her tell us what happened.

Julia

Bernice. Please, You're not gonna slap anybody's face."

Bernice

"Anthony, did they hurt you? Do you need mouth to mouth?"

Anthony

"Nah, they didn't."

Bernice

"Listen up people, you mess with my homeboy, and I'll get busy with you! (Barking) WOOF! WOOF! WOOF WOOF WOOF! WOOF WOOF WOOF!

Julia

" Calm down! CALM DOWN! Nobody's gonna hurt you. Nobody's gonna hurt anybody."

Bernice

"How do I know that you're telling me the truth?!"

Bernice

"Do you know what I really enjoy?"

"As if we'd care."

Bernice

"Stop right there sister, you can peck at the chickens, but don't mess with the mother hen."

"Do I have to listen to this barnyard babble from this silly-old goose?!"

Bernice

(Jumps up out of the sofa, and demands a challenge to Mrs. Beecham.) "That doe's it! Let's take this outside! Hold me back, I'm gonna knock her block off!"

Julia

(Restrains and calms Bernice down.) "Bernice, Bernice!"