4th most-quoted character in Designing Women: in 60 of its 255 quotes Most scenes with: Julia (32), Suzanne (29), Mary Jo (23)
Lines by Charlene 7
Charlene
Y'know, I don't know why more people can't raise their kids the way Andy Taylor did. I mean, Opie had to work for everything he got. Y'know when he did make a mistake or he wanted to do something stupid, Andy never just came right out and said no. Y'know like the time Opie wanted to move out when he was eleven to get his own place... Andy helped him save his little allowance — which if I remember right at the time was 50 cents a week — and Andy put it in the bank. So instead of having a big fight about it, y'know, Opie is all the time thinking that someday he's gonna own this house, y'know — even though Andy knew full well what the property values were in Mayberry, and that at the rate of 50 cents a week you'd be 82 before you could even afford the inside of an outhouse.
[(pausing to think)]
Y'know when you get right down to it, Andy tricked Opie. wish I hadn't started this — now I'm upset!
[Charlene, Julia, and Mary Jo head to Design Expo but end up stuck in their hotel room together with the flu.]
Charlene
I haven't felt this bad since I was in high school and I developed this temporary allergy to domestic meat. My poor parents had to mail order hippopotamus steaks. I'm not kidding, y'know. Until they finally figured out I could have stuff like squirrel and rabbit and 'coon, y'know. Sometimes they even fed me 'coon for breakfast...
[Charlene has a heart-to-heart with Bill's mother.]
Charlene
I love your son with all my heart, and I'll do anything to make him happy. But as much as I want to fit into his family, I'm just as proud of the one I come from.
(reading a tabloid) I can't believe this. Did you see this? Droves of vicious killer bees are headed toward the United States. They're from South America, expected to arrive in three to four years. That is terrible. Can you imagine? I'll bet our bees are scared to death.
[The ladies are in New Orleans for Design Expo, and Charlene and Suzanne meet the ladies at a bar after spending the day on the town.]
Charlene
We're having so much fun. We followed this jazz band down the street to this big ol' party. We partied for two hours until I realized it was somebody's funeral.
Look, Mary Jo, all that I'm saying is that I'm not gonna pay one red cent on that ticket, and if I have to I'll take it all the way to the Supreme Court!
(very dramatically) We're on the way to the bank to make that deposit, right? But the car breaks down, so while they're working on it, Julia decides that we should walk to the bank and make our "drive-thru" deposit on foot... because the inside of the bank doesn't open until 10.
So there we are standing in the drive-thru, and when we "pull up"--- so to speak — to the glass window, the guy refuses to accept our deposit because we're not inside a vehicle.
So Julia commandeers the back seat of the woman behind us and starts yelling for this woman to drive us through the drive-thru! and then the bank manager makes Julia get out of the woman's car, and then the police come. Need I say more?
Charlene
Well, Julia. If you're not gonna pay the ticket, what's your defense gonna be?
My defense is... that when I attempted to use that drive-thru window, I was indeed inside a vehicle; the vessel in which I have chosen to go through life — my body!
What was that like having a hillbilly Thanksgiving? Did you have Turkey?
Charlene
(sarcastically) No. Possum! Daddy killed it, Mama stuffed it, then at the table we'd all have a big food fight, then afterward wittle sticks and sit on the front porch pickin' our teeth!
Designing Women · 255 quotes
Charlene
