BSBar staff
What are you doing?
...It's a Giggle Loop.
BSBar staff
It's not a loop, it's a stack.
Well I couldn't call it a Giggle Stack now, could I.
That would sound ridiculous.
Exactly!
S1 E3Sex, Death and Nudity
S1 E4Inferno
I don't know if she has seen the tape. And if she has seen it, what does she think? That I'm some kind of masturbating pervert?
You are.
We all are.
True.
I'm an emotional vegetarian. I know a lot of vegetarians and we tend to like the same films.
S1 E5The Girl with Two Breasts
I need breasts with brains. I don’t mean individual brains, obviously... I mean, not a brain each. You know, I like intelligent women, but you’ve got to draw the line somewhere.
You draw the line at intelligent breasts?
I think breast brains would be over-egging the woman pudding.
Do you know what would be the best way to wipe out all of human kind?... Make all women telepathic because if they suddenly found out about the kind of stuff that goes on in our heads they'd kill us all on the spot. Men are not people. We are disgustoids in human form!
Well, how'd it go?
She's leaving the country, doesn't speak English, I insulted her friend's breasts and she thinks I collect women's ears in a bucket.
Well, you've had worse.
S1 E6The Cupboard of Patrick's Love
You know, when I was a kid, I used to write the word "naked" hundreds of times on a bit of paper and then rub my face in it. It's better than sex.
"Room in your cupboard for one more"? You said that?
Yeah. I really thought I'd gone to his house, you know, to "heal our spiritual divide," but it turns out I was just gagging for a shag. Those two are so similar!
S2 E1The Man With Two Legs
There's one thing I don't get here. You've seen this woman on the train and you find her attractive, right?
Yeah.
And you haven't had sex with her?
No.
You see my problem?
Let me explain, Patrick. Here on Earth, there is a gap between seeing someone you like and having sex with them that we like to call conversation. In Jeff's case, it can last for up to ten years.
Are you saying I don't converse? I converse. I talk to women.
Well, do the women talk too?
[Pause] Well, they must do.
I've always wanted to date a gynaecologist. I want to know I'm special.
But what about my legs, Steve? She's bound to count them eventually!
I've got the key to the gates of paradise... but I've got too many legs!
S2 E2My Dinner in Hell
You know what they say: If music be the food of love, then masturbation is just a snack between meals.
[Patrick doesn't realize a sculpture of his penis was actually for a sex toy]
I think you may have been had, mate.
And a lot more often than you realize.
S2 E3Her Best Friend's Bottom
[Steve is relating the fact that he accidentally saw Sally naked]
So, how was it?
It was a bottom... I hadn't seen it before... I wasn't bored.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Coupling pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.