Showing up early, helping others, sending girls away? Could this be a whole new Jeff Winger?
Don't ruin it by approving it.
Community · Season 4
Showing up early, helping others, sending girls away? Could this be a whole new Jeff Winger?
Don't ruin it by approving it.
I wish to end all wars.
That's another rule. No wishes containing the word 'all'. Guaranteed ironic consequences.
I don't think anyone's going to miss wars.
Star Wars, Thumb wars, wow, Storage Wars!
The dead can't have business. They can't want, or think, or do. It's the living that choose to be haunted.
I remember when this show was about community college.
Ghosts can’t go through doors, stupid; they’re not fire.
[at an Inspector SpaceTime convention]
Jeff, why are people staring at you?
'Cause they've never seen a man who's had sex before?
We come all this way, and you just leave me alone without so much as sending a text message? I'm sick of it, Jeff... Nigel... Winger! [tries to throw two more drinks in Jeff's face, but realises they are empty] Can I get two more of these, please?
Enough! This day has turned crazy. I'm gonna go upstairs, towel off, and pray to God that I wake up in the middle of a final in a class I didn't know I was enrolled in. [storms off]
Don't worry. If there is one thing Germans don't do, it's hold a grudge.
Unless we're talking about Die Hard 3.
Or the 20th century.
I really am Hitler.
Yeah.
So it's just decided? No vote or anything?
I hate this. I wish there was a way we could make it up to people.
That's it! We need to make reparations. We have to start giving back, because Greendale has given us so much. It gave us the study room. And that study room is our home. But our home is more than those four walls. And our family is more than the seven of us. It's all of Greendale. And everyone deserves to have what we have. [after the study group finishes the study room make overs] What do you know? Greendale just got slightly better.
[The study group returns to Study Room F]
It’s good to be back.
Should we go celebrate at Skeepers?
Aw, come on, Shirley; we all have lives.
There you are! I am so proud how you stepped up and made amends, and everyone forgave you! Because when it comes right down to it, Greendale's a forgiving place.
It really is.
Please keep that in mind for the next 20 seconds; remember that people can "chang".
People can what?
Hmm?
[Chang walks into the study room]
Hi, I'm Kevin.
AAAAAAAAHHHHHH!
[whispering] He has Changnesia.
I thought I told you to stop reading my emails.
Well, I thought I told you to stop keeping secrets!
Psychology tells us there are no accidents.
What about car accidents, Tara Reid, or the Hindenburg?
I'm gonna go get a sandwich, which, unlike "changnesia," is real.
Kevin doesn't know about labor laws, or forty hour work weeks, or that that guy named him after his dog.
The perfect mix of low intellect, limited ambition, and limitless parental support.
So, a rich dum-dum who will never graduate and keep dropping money into the school indefinitely. Got it.
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